#i guess its a show of how he can simultaneously feel real feelings while also weaponizing and flanderizing them to use on others.

[heyidkyay]

And I'm petrified of being alone, now |

Part Twenty-Four

Summary: She’s just trying to get by, really. What with being a single parent to her four year old son whilst simultaneously trying to kick start a successful career as a radio presenter. She’s got everything she’s ever wanted though, friends close by, a mum who’s merely a phone call away, and of course her baby boy. What else is there to wish for? But then, it’s not long before her relatively normal life gets upended and turned on its head, and she’s suddenly forced to deal with situations she’s never even thought to imagine.

What happens when one mention of a certain controversial singer on her show sends a flood of unexpected challenges her way?

Authors note: I’m here:) finally. It’s been a while, idk how long, not that long but long enough i guess, sorry for the wait! This one is wordy but also has a lot going on, so hope you enjoy!

Ngl, this can probably be read as a standalone if anyone’s seeing this and not started the series, it’s just a bit angsty and mostly smut? But unsure, I said probably! X

Warnings: Arguing, usual Matty and Mouse thinking (feels like it needs its own warning at this point, they’re saddos), smut, unprotected sex, EMOTIONS (because yeah)

> Last update: look back here if you'd like!

Masterlist

There was something raw in the bitterness that was love. Like the sour skin of an apple that was first thought to be sweet. Love was deceiving in itself really, but it was never alone. It brought life and light. It wrought anger. It stirred both jealousy and pity. It gave and gave, until all you were left with was that tart tang aftertaste. 

Some people revelled in it.

Others, withered away.

Years before, perhaps maybe not even that long ago now, Matty would have belonged to the former. He had enjoyed the strings he found that could tie him to people, sex and money had given him the ability to do it, to keep them there, to pull them alongside him. And he’d indulged in it all, beyond what most would consider extortionate. 

And still, even after everything, when the fun had ended and the games had been discarded, and he’d just been tossed off somewhere to the side… Alone once more. He had continued on. On and on and on, until he ultimately had lost himself completely.

The last few months had shifted something in him though.

And now here he was, still angry and bitter and resentful. But full of actual love. The raw type. The kind that left you marvelling at the most stupid things— insipid little concepts that held no actual value or any real detail worth getting all starry-eyed over.

It had wormed its way into the hollow shell that was his heart and rebuilt some part of him that he believed he had long since destroyed.

He wanted to scoff at the very thought. The very idea that an emotion could be felt so strongly that it differed the world around you; that, singularly, it could change you. The notion was far too complex, too out there to even begin to fathom, but then again, Matty supposed that emotions were exactly that. Complex.

It sent his mind reeling. Had his entire body aching with a fever to expel the feeling completely, if only so that he could think freely again, so it wouldn’t hurt to merely breathe anymore.

You should have told me.

He knew that. He had admitted as much.

And yet, he still hadn’t told her.

He’d lied.

Why didn’t you tell me?

And that was the question, wasn’t it? Why hadn’t he just told her?

Fear, he guessed.

Yet another morbid emotion in which Matty had always been so wary of. Another lost feeling he thought he’d swallowed whole and hidden somewhere deep down. Because there was no fear in a drug induced haze. When you were off partying or chasing some other euphoric high. What the fuck was there to be fearful of? When the chilling buzz which shook you to your very core blanketed over everything else.

When there was always that silence.

That numb quiet he had chased and craved and cherished.

Though, he supposed, it was nothing compared to the fear of losing this.

Of losing her.

Still, Matty could not for the life of him find it in himself to tell her exactly that. Those words lost on him, lodged in the column of his throat and etching themselves a home there.

“Where do we go from here?”

He blinked at the sound of his own voice, looking up at her shadowed expression and at how tired she then seemed. How different she now looked compared to the moment they’d first met. 

She’d been something of a presence even then. Always effortlessly complex. With her soft smile and guarded eyes. Eyes he’d gone and fucking wondered about for hours on end.

Those eyes which were now caught on the far wall stood opposite, the one lined with coloured photo frames and that odd little doodle Teddy had gotten in trouble for only a couple of weeks prior. 

The realisation made Matty mourn the few days they’d spent apart.

After a long moment, she finally shrugged at him and he found himself swallowing tightly at the movement. Startled by her seeming lack of care. 

“I don’t want to lose you, Squeaks.” 

It was honest. As honest as he could be.

She huffed an amused breath in return though, “Not like you’re short on company, Matty.”

He felt his gaze snap up to meet hers then, head shifting with it. 

“What’s that even meant to mean?” He asked her, frowning now, at the way she had crossed her arms over her chest and how her shoulders had hunched on their own accord whilst she casually moved to glance out the window. Matty forced himself up onto his feet, hating the fact she had turned away from him.

“I saw everything, Matty.” Mouse replied tiredly, as though she was fed up, fed up with this, with them. “I saw the articles.”

Matty’s stomach bottomed out at her words, he stepped towards her. “Nothing happened.” He murmured, taking another step closer. “Nothing fucking happened, Squeaks. I swear it.”

She tensed but didn’t quite flinch at his sudden approach, so he kept a little distance between them, even as desperate as he was to hold her. To shake her enough so that she would see sense, that she’d realise how stupid he would have had to have been to have gone near anyone else. That girl was no one, she’d meant nothing. 

“You can swear that, can you?” She mocked him, one corner of her mouth toying with a merciless smile that didn’t quite suit her. “You were gone, Matty. Fucking out of it. That much was clear to see just from the photos alone.”

Matty stared at her helplessly.

She shook her head.

“I’d had a couple drinks. That isn’t a crime!” He stressed, automatically falling onto the defensive, “Didn’t mean I was stupid enough to get with the first person I fucking saw! That girl- she was off her head too. Had mates with her even! But she was just trying to help me, Mouse. That’s all it was.” 

She was shaking her head again now, tongue catching on her incisor; a dead giveaway to how stressed she was, how anxious she was getting. Matty only wished to shoulder it all, that defensiveness of his faltering slightly at the sight of her trying to hide it all. To stay strong. How fucking long had she had to do that?

“I feel like such a fool, Matty.” She finally spoke, her voice trembling with the onslaught of tears that glazed her eyes but she didn’t dare let fall. “A fucking fool. ‘Cause I’d thought that things were okay, that we were okay. That I could finally relax and let you in. But then-“ She paused, a sad huff leaving her, “Then you went and dropped this mess in my lap and somehow expected me to just deal with it. To tell you it’s all fine. That we could make it right.”

Mouse turned then, ever so slowly, looking about as defeated as Matty had ever seen her. He felt his chest burn with the last breath he hadn’t remembered taking let alone hold onto, too afraid to look away, to even move. 

“But you embarrassed me. You’ve made the whole world believe I am that fool. That I was as naive as they’d first made me out to be. As my friends thought me to be.” 

Her smile was shattered and broken, her voice wet and hoarse, but she continued on even as her hands fell limply to her sides and she took a single step closer.

“And to make things worse, you didn’t just hurt me, Matty. You hurt Teddy too.”

���

Hit them where it hurts.

That was the saying, wasn’t it?

But it only left me feeling all the more sour- gutless. As well as a little stupid, I supposed, wondering if Matty even cared for Teddy at all, or how he had felt the last couple days.

Though I shouldn’t have second guessed it, not when the way Matty’s face immediately paled and then fell proved me wrong. 

Deep down, I knew that he cared. In his own odd way he had always cared. But to know it and to see it were two entirely different things.

And although it was true, that Matty had in fact hurt Teddy. It still felt like a shitty thing to say to him then. But he’d hurt me as well, hadn’t he. And even though I’d been hurting most of my life, Matty being the reason for all that hurt pained me in a way I couldn’t even comprehend. 

“I didn’t-”

I scoffed at his attempted reply, but my heart wasn’t in it, breaking all over again. I wondered how long we could drag this out. If we even would.

“Mean to?” I finished for him, shaking my head stupidly. “I know you didn’t mean to, Matty. Doesn’t change the fact that you still did it.”

His eyes slipped closed just as his lips fell apart, and when he opened them again I was stuck staring into his devastated gaze. 

“If I could take it all back, I would.” He breathed, “I promise you I would.”

I swallowed back my own tears, even as they burned and pricked at my throat and eyes. “But you can’t.”

And it was as simple as that, wasn’t it? He couldn’t ever take it back. 

I don’t want to lose you.

He knew just how to get under my skin, past all that rusted armour of mine.

It was what made this all so much harder. 

“Tell me what to do, Squeaks.” Matty croaked pleadingly, hand reaching out towards me before he looked down at it, blinked, and then let it fall. “I’ll do it, just– tell me.”

What was left that he could do? When it felt like things had so suddenly and so horrifically fallen out from under us.

“I don't know.” I told him honestly, in a barely there whisper, “I just don't know, Matty.”

He stepped even closer then, hand moving to capture my jaw in a determined haste, not restraining himself like he had just moments before. I tried to pull away, titling my chin and looking off to the side as I clenched my teeth, but his thumb was there, luring me back in, forcing me to meet his eye.

“I’m not just gonna give up.” His other hand jumped to cradle my face, a cushion to those heated words. 

I was reluctant in my needless wanting, desperate to be held whilst simultaneously wanting to push him away. So I lifted my hands up to cover his own, unsure of the choice they’d make. To stay, or go.

“It’s not about that, Matty.” I heard myself say pathetically, voice wavering with each word, “You can’t just forget this.”

His dark eyes were trained on me, flickering over every square inch of my scarred face. I’d never felt insecure about them when I was around him, but this moment felt too heated, too high strung. And I’d been burning the candle at both ends the last few days, so with him being this close, this intense, every emotion I’d felt was brimming closer and closer to the surface. 

Instead of facing him, I turned away, hiding once more as I worked my jaw and felt my hands slip down to the backs of his forearms.

A shared breath and then,

“Don’t do that.” Matty whispered in the quiet, almost begging. “Don’t hide from me.”

His thumb smoothed over the skin of my cheek and I was all but putty in hands, looking back at him just as a tear escaped me and slid to meet the pad of it. 

Matty brushed the tear away without thought, before he leant in to rest his forehead against my own. The action forced me to cling tighter to his arms, eyes closing to keep from embarrassing myself any further. I wouldn’t cry. 

I wouldn’t cry.

“Look at me.” He demanded, nose so close that I could practically sense its phantom touch. And foolishly, I did as he asked. “You-” His breath stuttered as his eyes pleaded with me, sounding forced as it broke free from him, his fingers making a home for themselves in my hair. 

“You don’t know what you do to me. How much of a mess I’ve made of myself. How much I have missed you.” Matty confessed, his voice quiet in the small space shared between us, in a place where we were both sheltered and unseen. “And I’m sorry. I am so fucking sorry. Enough that I’ll keep on repeating it until you fucking believe me. Enough that I’d do just about anything for you to see how much I want this.”

He sucked in a breath, and I blinked back at him, lips tingling with the sensation of his proximity. 

“I know I messed up. I know.” He repeated, eyes flickering back and forth between my own whilst his thumbs trailed the line of my hair. “But all I’m asking for is a chance to make it right. To be better. Squeaks, I’d do it all over again in a heartbeat if I could.”

His breath was tickling the skin of my cheek as well as the corner of my mouth, it almost made it difficult to think let alone remember how to breathe. I wanted–

Suddenly my eyes were looking down, focused on his parted mouth, on the stubble he’d let grow across the cut of his chin as well as his upper lip. His nose finally brushed past my own, touching ever so carefully as one or both of us pressed nearer, almost there, inching closer but not close enough.

“Tell me no.” 

Instantly, I was thrown back to that first night he kissed me. I hadn’t told him no then, and for some reason I couldn’t find it in me to decline him now. 

So instead I took, all but biting as my hand cradled the back of his neck and closed that short amount of distance between us. My nails dug into the exposed skin of his nape, where the collar of his shirt jumped with each move he made. My teeth nipped at his lower lip, angry in my attempt to swallow him whole, teeth clashing as we both stumbled, moving and moving until Matty’s back hit the nearest wall.

How the roles had reversed, I thought to myself as Matty’s shoulders flexed beneath his shirt and jumped under my ever roaming hands. I hated the desire that it stirred through me, knowing how easily he could take back control with his carefully contained strength. But he didn’t, instead he gave my fury something to latch onto.

My hand lifted to pin one of his wrists somewhere to the left of his head, glare not wavering even as his stubborn gaze met my own. He was as riled up as me.

“You have some nerve.” I all but spat, watching on as his chest rose and fell, questioning how quickly everything had switched.

“Yeah?” Matty bit back, those familiar brown eyes- a colour that had always brought me comfort- were blazing now as they trailed over the flush that I was sure lined my face. “Why’s that? You’re the one with me pinned, darlin’.” 

His heavy gaze traced the bow of my lip, slumping ever slightly in his stance so that his head could fall closer forward. My breath hitched.

That was all he needed apparently, to earn the upper hand here. Because in a moment, the room was spinning and then I was the one being crowded against the wall, fury be damned.

Contrary to my previous endeavour, Matty’s touch was still as careful as ever, making it that much more obvious that I could slip away if I so wanted. But the question was whether or not I did.

“Matty–”

But he just carried on, as though he hadn’t even heard me speak, voice a low breathy murmur. 

“I’ve been stuck in this endless loop. Driving myself mad.” He told me, his knee angled enough so that he could let his head dip towards the juncture of my neck, his mouth pausing by the shell of my ear whilst a finger gently trailed its way up over my hip. “Wonderin’ if I’d lost this for good.”

My heart pounded in my chest as the ghost of his words tickled my skin, tensing when his nose ever so slightly grazed my jaw. 

That finger of his continued to move, working its way up my torso, jumping across my ribs and up to the bone of my collar. My gaze was fixed on the opposing wall, on the mirror that framed my dazed face and the back of his head. My hand worked its way into his unruly curls.

“But you’re as stubborn as me, see.” Matty added, luring me in, “And I’m not the type to give up on a sure thing.” His words held enough bite that I snapped back to meet his stare, he tilted his head at me whilst I scowled.

“Excuse me?”

Matty smiled, lids heavy as his careful hand danced its way back down my front. 

“And this,” He said, almost in a whisper, ignoring my retort as he hooked my leg around his waist, “This is a sure thing.”

A soft breath escaped me even as I batted his hand away, but he simply reached up to grip at my chin, touch tender even with the way his calloused thumb dragged down my lower lip.

I was slowly beginning to imagine that this was all a dream, something my sick mind had gone and conjured up in hopes to ignore all of the hurt he had put me through. Because this couldn’t be right, things couldn’t have fallen back into place this easily. 

“Matty.” I tried again, firmer this time, but was captured by the look his eyes held, probably having understood the expression that must have just crossed my face.

“What did you do, Squeaks?” He asked me almost hurriedly, shaking my chin between his forefinger and thumb, my previous anger and doubt melting slightly as I leaned further into his touch. “Did you want me to hurt, too?”

I blinked, caught off guard by the sudden question, his swift change in topic. Baffled by the fact that he was now trying to pin this back on me. 

Was that really what this was? I wanted to ask.

Matty didn’t give me the opportunity to say a thing though. My surprise had stalled me briefly, but it had evidently been long enough to allow him to simply carry on.

“What did you do, eh? Tell me.” He breathed before he pressed his mouth to my jaw, once and then twice, pulling away just as I tilted my head to accommodate him, “Did you go out, baby? Find somebody else? Or did you just stay here, waiting for me?”

I reeled back, anger spiking again. “Fuck you.”

Matty’s eyes flickered back and forth between mine. 

“I’m trying to get you to.” He said, always so brazen and snarky, even in the moments where I hated him most. The hand I had previously slapped away went back to the leg he still had draped over his hip, snaking up over my knee and to my thigh. 

My glare didn’t waiver, even as my breathing picked up at the pressure his fingertips wrought on my skin. 

“Tell me no.” He finally repeated, eyes failing to meet mine. And how was I supposed to? When having him this close brought back that fire he’d put out in me, when he was kissing my neck so sweetly?

“We’ll regret it.” It was as close to a no as I could get, enough to have him pause. Matty looked to me then, his hold loosening on my body but still holding. Hoping.

“Do you care?”

I marvelled at the question, did I care?

I cared so much it pained me.

But he hadn’t meant it like that. That much I knew.

Do you care if you regret it? Because, what if you don’t? 

With Matty there was always chance– he was the type to play the odds, to push his luck.

What if.

What if, what if, what if?

Shaking my head, I was forced to question if he understood me as much as I did him. If he could see each of my thoughts just as they dawned on me, flashing across my face like a story being told. 

Then I wondered whether or not I even wanted him to understand. This, this thing we were doing would only further complicate things between us, but perhaps this could be a goodbye.

But, if this was a goodbye, why was he looking at me like that? Watching and waiting for me to truly answer.

Tell me no, he’d said.

Matty’s gaze swept over my face, as though trying to read me, maybe in hopes to find what it was he was really searching for. 

Tell me no.

“Please.”

And my resolve broke at the word.

“Okay.” I heard myself say in reply, nodding quickly, and that was seemingly all the permission he needed before Matty was wrapping his arms around my waist and pulling me towards him fully.

My hands floundered momentarily before they were back on his shoulders, his teeth nipping at my neck. 

I moaned, eyes falling shut as he pressed hot, open-mouthed kisses down my skin, teeth scraping before his tongue swirled to soothe their angry ambush. I could smell him everywhere now, the shampoo I was so used to stealing, as well as the only aftershave he’d ever claimed to like.

His hips rolled into mine, pressing himself right against the fabric of my trousers and the underwear which had grown damp during our heated argument. 

I didn’t want to linger too long on the thought of my body’s obvious betrayal, too caught up in him to think about how wrong this should all feel.

“Shit.” Matty groaned, breath catching with it as he continued to grind against me.

I gasped back, grabbing at him harder as he bit down on the curve of my neck. I nipped at his jaw in retaliation, nails digging into the skin of his back, hoping to leave a mark.

“I knew you’d miss me.” He grunted into the base of my throat, the hands which held my waist dipping beneath the hem of my shirt to explore further. “Even when you’re angry you’ll wait. ‘Cause no one else can touch like me.”

A whine bypassed my lips almost involuntarily as he continued to rut against me, I wanted to be angry- no, in fact, I was angry. But all emotion other than want was blurring at the edges of my mind now, being pushed further and further back by each eager kiss he peppered along my jaw.

“You really–” I jerked in surprise, cutting myself off with a short gasp when his hand slipped past the hem of my trousers, fingers pressing against the damp fabric he found there. 

“What was that?” He provoked, and I could hear the smirk in his voice as he trailed over my covered clit, causing me to whimper before I was biting down on my lower lip. Matty didn’t like that much. “Come on, I wanna hear you.” He muttered, pressing a little harder, wanting a reaction. “Tell me.”

“You’re such a bastard.” I panted, head falling against his shoulder as my hips pushed further into his touch, seeking more.

Matty laughed, all breathy and lovely, mouth catching on the lobe of my ear before he hissed, “Yeah, but you like that about me.”

His hand was gone with that and I was almost tempted to ask, to even plead with him for its return, aching all the more now, enough that all I could think about was riding his fingers until I couldn’t think at all. 

But then Matty was grabbing my waist again, his grip hard, firm, and I swallowed when he whispered into my ear once more.

“Jump.”

Without thinking, I jumped. 

We collided, his mouth on mine and the two of us moving as though it was second nature. And in a way, it was. But it shouldn’t have been. I knew that. I tried to remind myself of it. 

He shouldn’t be here.

But he was. Walking his way through my flat with ease, effortlessly missing each sharp corner and the miniscule step which led back into the hallway. He was blind, my hands in his hair as he manoeuvred us into my bedroom, throwing me down onto sheets that he’d never seen, let alone slept in. 

I tugged him down with me, his hands moving to unbutton those fucking jeans he always wore as he worked his way back into my mouth. 

He hovered over me after kicking them off, my head pressed to the pillows as his eyes roamed every inch of my face. “Beautiful.” He whispered, as though he hadn’t really meant to say the word aloud.

My breath hitched anyway but Matty paid it no mind, leaning in closer to kiss me again, slower this time around, though his hands were still quick, tugging at the hem of my top enough so that I got the hint. I lifted myself up, breaking away to take it off and toss it to the side. 

Matty kissed his way down my neck again, following the trail of scars down my torso until his fingers paused to hook around the top of my trousers. I nodded at his silent ask, planting my feet a little firmer on the mattress so that they could follow my tee.

Matty stopped then, kneeling between my parted thighs, eyes caught on the panties I was wearing, and I could swear something in his gaze shifted as he stared down at me. 

“Lace?” He murmured, fingers curling around my thighs tight enough to bruise as he pushed forward, closer to my face. “Really?”

It was a loaded question. Almost felt like an accusation.

I shrugged– I hadn’t meant to end up here, but it hadn’t been subconscious when I’d picked them out of the pile this morning. He liked the way they looked, had told me so one night spent at his when he’d talked me into smoking a couple joints with him sprawled out on his living room floor. 

I opened my mouth to reply but Matty didn’t quite catch the motion, already busying himself with the task of pulling the lace down my thighs. His fingers, calloused from years of playing guitar, dragged alongside the black material rolling down my legs. I tensed at the feeling, zeroing in on the slow motion, then listened to him groan at the sight before they were gone completely.

I watched him pull away, balling the damp fabric up in a fist before leaning over the side of the bed to drop them on top of his jeans. 

“A souvenir?” I couldn’t help but question, mostly out of mirth, but humour helped deflect from the weight I felt at having him here.

Matty hummed, fingers already back on me, trailing the length of my right leg before he was stretching his way back up again, head stopping between my parted thighs and nosing at a crease sat at the very top. He didn’t answer me though, instead choosing to shut me up with another gasp by dragging his thumb across my folds.

“Matty.”

“Hm?” He hummed again, having sat back on his heels to watch me squirm as he continued on. I shot him a rather annoyed glare.

“Take off your shirt and fuck me.” 

His brows rose languidly when he flicked his eyes back up to meet mine, then tilted his head. “But I’m having so much fun.”

With a swift kick to his side, Matty’s hand fell away and he shook his head around the beginnings of a smile. “Always so demanding.” He tutted and before I could spit something back– probably about him being the biggest hypocrite I knew– he was placing his hands either side of my head and leaning forward so that his lips were right beside my ear, his breath fanning the shell of it. “You gonna beg for it?”

My breathing grew heavy as I watched him pull away, dragging a finger up the inside of my thigh before stilling ever so briefly and venturing on, up over my hip and then my ribs. He pressed a slow kiss to my chest, eyes flicking up to find mine as his tongue swirled over the skin, there and then gone.

“Come on–”

He huffed a quiet laugh, the force of it lighting goosebumps over my exposed flesh. “Come on, baby. Beg.”

I rolled my eyes, reaching up to grab at his neck but he was already dancing out of my reach. He jutted his chin. 

“Matty.” I huffed.

“Yeah?”

I really wanted to throttle him, “Fuck me. I’m not asking.”

The corner of his mouth tugged itself up into a small smirk, “Good enough.”

A disbelieving chuckle escaped me, one which was quickly cut short by his wandering hands finding purchase on my hips once more, before he dragged me down the length of the bed, his mouth finding purchase on the swell of my breast.

He pressed fast kisses along the curve of it until his tongue flicked out over the nipple, causing me to gasp. My hands flew out to tangle themselves in his hair when he lapped it into his mouth to suck and I groaned at the weight of his hands cradling the curve of my back. 

“Matty.”

He hummed and the sound sent vibrations rippling out across my skin, I fisted my hands into his curls harder.

Shifting until my hips found his whilst he lavished at my chest, I pressed up into him, both annoyed by the fact he was still clad in his boxers and pleased by the very visible wet patch I could see. I ground against him and the sensation elicited moans from the pair of us, his hands flying down to hold my hips steady.

“Patience.” He murmured, but I was having none of it, lifting a leg against his arse to spur him closer. Matty’s head jerked up at the surprise before he looked down at me and stared. “You’ll be the death of me.”

“You better hope not.” I replied, hands finding the hem of his shirt and dragging it off before he could fight me on it. “I’ll make it painful.”

“Counting on it.” Matty murmured back, hair now a mess, either from the clutch I’d had on it moments before or from the way I’d all but yanked his top over his head. “On all fours,” He said roughly, tapping my outer thigh twice. My already flushed skin heated further at the understanding of how he wanted to take me but– contrary to popular belief– I didn’t argue and rolled onto my stomach.

Palms to the sheets, I pushed myself up onto my hands and knees, eyes trained on the headboard. I grinned to myself when I heard Matty groan at the sight, looking back over my shoulder only briefly to see him palming himself through his boxers.

“Don’t have all day, Healy.” I prompted after a moment passed, just before the mattress shifted beneath his weight. I heard something drop to the floor a second later before he was right up behind me.

I jolted a tad at his sudden touch, then was forced to focus on the way his hands slid over my hips with that same familiarity they’d always done, moving up to the swell of my arse to squeeze it before dropping back down to spread my legs further apart.

A moment passed and I was forced to wait in the silence he then gifted me, waiting and waiting until I finally went to say something. It was then that I felt a finger glide down my spine, dragging ever so slowly over my jumping muscles. 

“Hands,” Matty then reminded and I was forced to blink away the haze I had drifted into, reaching up to grab onto the headboard just as I felt him swipe his dick between my thighs, guiding himself up over my folds, pushing past them so he rested at my entrance. 

I let go of a rush of air, splaying my hands further against the headboard before he slammed into me without any warning at all, all the way up to the hilt whilst I cried out at the sudden fullness. “Fuck.” I hissed, head falling between my shoulders as I winced. 

I breathed through the bit of pain that came with the thrust, acknowledging that Matty didn’t move an inch and instead keeping still, hands holding my hips even as he leaned over to whisper, “You good?”

His voice was surprisingly soft in the quietness that encased the flat, reminding me of other times we’d spent here, both like this and in other odd moments. It made my chest ache.

I took another moment to adjust to him before I nodded, “Yeah. Yeah, I’m fine.”

He hummed in turn but didn’t question it, just waited, thumbs circling the skin on my hips for a moment in a manner so gentle and yet so very Matty, before finally, he moved. 

His thrusts were shallow and slow at first, his thumbs keeping the same steady tempo as they continued to soothe the tops of my hips. I moaned at the feel of him, before I managed to roll my hips back to meet his own, enjoying the sound that escaped him.

“So good.” He said, hand sliding further up my side and towards my ribs before I was titling my head back and Matty was holding a fistful of my hair. He just held it for a bit, forearm pressed against the skin of my back before his thrusts began to grow harder, tugging more and more.

The room was quickly filled with the sounds of our groans along with the bedframe rocking against the wall and I praised all the Gods above for the fact that there were currently no neighbours residing in the flat beyond it, before I was quickly swept up once more in the thick scent of sweat and sex. Matty fucking into me with a desperation I’d never quite experienced from him before.

I panted beneath him, nails digging into the wood of my headboard whilst he picked up the pace.

I couldn’t quite focus on anything but him. His breathy whispers, his fingertips which dotted my skin, the feel of him rocking in and out of me. It was almost as though nothing else existed but this moment, even if I knew it would soon end. His thrusts getting sloppier, his grip tightening, his murmured praises increasing by a tenfold. 

“Come on, baby.”

I liked when he called me that.

Made me feel special. 

But that thought soon soured. Because, was I really? 

How could I be anything special when my whole life I’d been nothing but a doormat for people to walk all over? I couldn’t help but think that Matty would be the same, like he’d gotten too close and finally seen what everybody else already had.

“Squeaks, baby. What do you need?”

I whimpered at his ask, tears collecting in the corners of my eyes. “I–”

What the fuck did I need? It wasn’t meant to feel so loaded, that question. But it felt as though the walls were now closing in. Because was this it? Was this the end?

“I–” I tried, feeling Matty’s fingers slip from the ends of my hair before a gentle palm laid itself flat on the small of my back.

“So good for me.” I heard him say and I moaned at the slight praise, breathing harder as he continued to mumble mostly to himself, “So pretty. So good.”

I was almost there, back arching under his palm as the other moved away from the right grasp it held on my hip, fingers finally finding my clit, knowing exactly what I needed.

“Yes.” I panted as the combination of his hard thrusts and steady hand sent my head into a dizzying pool of water, “God, yes. I–”

I think I screamed as I came, his fingers working deftly whilst mine clung to the headboard, body trembling as I fought to keep myself up. But Matty was there, holding me long enough so that he could reach his high and pull out with a loud grunt, coating my inner thighs. 

We stayed there for, I don’t know how long, until he finally released me, falling away whilst I slumped forward onto the pillows before us. He followed a second later, still catching his breath as he stared up at the ceiling. I watched him, eyes hidden behind my forearm and a sprawl of hair that had fallen over my face, content to soak in what I could of him. What I had left.

Then Matty shifted beside me, I half expected him to get up and leave with some half-arsed excuse on the tip of his tongue, but he paused when he caught my heavy gaze. I let my eyes trail over the side of face, on the tired circles settled beneath his lash line and the slope of his nose.

He looked back towards the ceiling.

“You got your souvenir, remember?” I found myself saying, stupidly, voice just above a croaked murmur, “Don’t let me keep you.”

Quiet. And then, “Do you want me to?”

I knew what he meant, but still I asked, “Want what?”

Matty’s head slowly turned towards me, eyes guarded and peering over at my devastated form. I wondered what he made of me right then, if he thought anything at all. 

When he offered me no words, I refused to add anything either and felt what was left of my heart crumple up into a pitiful bundle when he pushed himself to the edge of a bed with a barely there sigh.

The air in my lungs caught as I watched and waited, eyes trailing after him as he rounded the bed frame to pick up his discarded boxers. I let them slip closed again, not wanting to watch him leave. 

I listened to his feet pad across the hardwood floors and out of the room. My chest ached with every step but I didn’t dare stop him, burying my face further into my pillow. 

I laid in wait for the front door to open, for there to be a clue to his evident departure, but then the footsteps returned. I didn’t dare give myself false hope, knowing he must have forgotten something to have come back. But the padding continued, closer and closer until they were back by the bed and I held my breath as it creaked, my eyes stinging just as I felt a warm damp cloth press against my inner thighs, wiping me clean.

I choked on the sob that wanted to escape me and the cloth paused for a split second before venturing on. I waited, wondering why he was doing this, why he was dragging it out.

Just leave already.

But then the cloth was pulling away again, and the bed was creaking again, and the tears, they wouldn’t stop. 

Stay. 

Please just stay.

I gasped into the pillowcase, stomach tensing with the strength to keep quiet. To let him leave quietly. 

I wouldn’t cry.

And then there was quiet, at least for a moment or two, before the bed dipped once more and there was a hand in my hair, combing the strands from out of my face and tucking them behind my ear.

When I opened my eyes, he was still there. Dressed and ready to go, but still sitting there beside me. Whilst I laid bare, curled up into a ball to better protect myself from his knowing gaze.

Suddenly everything hurt. Suddenly I felt exhausted and was falling apart at the seams.

Matty moved carefully, stretching toward the foot of the bed before returning with the sheet to cover me up, laying it gently over my trembling shoulders. He leaned in to press a slow kiss to my forehead and then went to move away again.

My hand caught his wrist.

And then I was flat out sobbing. Hysterical even. Crying into the pillow almost soundlessly as I gasped to try and catch my breath. Because I wanted him to stay. I needed him to stay.

Not just for me. But for Teddy. And for the life he brought into my dreary flat. To the kindness he never failed to gift me.

I needed him to stay.

I needed him.

I opened my mouth to ask, to let him know. But I could hardly even bear to look at him, blurred as he was through my onslaught of tears, Matty still held the key to all but destroying what little I had left.

His hand returned to my hair, fingers tangling themselves in it, a sudden contrast to the rough grip they’d held there earlier. And then he settled further onto the bed, back pressed against the headboard whilst he continued to run his fingers through my hair.

The tears still flowed but the sobs came less and less, until I was blinking at his shadowed figure in the dark, holding out hope that somehow he’d just know and he’d stay. 

[firemenenthusiast]

lol this is random but Archie or whoever is in charge needs to HURRY the hell up with that Lurker movie. like im glad that he's relaxing and having fun n all that but my god it's taking FOREVERRRR. I don't want to sound like entitled or anything but there's barely been any anything else about the movie, not even crumbs really, well I know he was in his pink hair era and the video of him on the stage (i think it was for a scene but idk don't take my word lol) but it wasn't for that long. like did we ever even get any details about what it would be about besides that my girl Havana was in it??? idk I just need more new Archie characters to get obsessed with and occupy my headspace 😭😭😭, and hopefully this time he'll get his flowers because the salt burn era did NOT give him attention he deserved. like Archie did not act out Farleigh in such a amazing and interesting way for the both of them to be overlooked. but then again i don't think salt burn got enough attention either, like in the sense that it felt like everyone stopped talking about it in a few months 🥲. it still surprises me that Farleigh didn't get popular enough on tiktok and Tumblr (a little bit) because I would think he's THE ideal character that people would fawn and thirst over while simultaneously psychoanalyzing him 🤷🏾‍♀️

BRO I KNOW RIGHT ??? i dont know how long they’re gonna make us wait but it sure feels like FOREVER since it wrapped. and i dont think the shooting took that much time for it to take THIS long to come out ? like i already am so ready to write for oliver the singer and IM SOOOO READY for lurker in general.

also yeah saltburn had its 5 seconds of fame and thats IT. now people barely talk about it and some even have forgotten about it 😭 and omg yes archie potrayed farleigh so well i have to keep reminding myself that he’s a character and not a real person. also people were too focused on the surface level scenes like the bathtub scene and the graveyard scene. farleigh had his favourite side character moment but imo it should’ve gone for atleast longer than it had.

farleigh is the perfect side character that i would fall head over heels for just like how i do with other side characters from other shows. i think its because he only had like 5mins of screentime that people overlooked him and people focused on jacob elordi more. but yk its more common for people to obsess over the main character especially a conveniently attractive one at that. farleigh was complex and had depth and i guess people didnt favor that as much. anyways i do think that its also because saltburn came out at the wrong time. if only it came out in summer i think it would’ve gotten the recognition it deserves and most importantly i want people to appreciate archie’s work in it more than they do now. i want him receiving AWARDS. dont get me started on how there was a strike when his biggest main character movie came out. i could only imagine how frustrating that must’ve been.

tbh i think archie’s not one to really chase after the typical hollywood recognition. he just wants to do what he loves, enjoy what he’s doing and live a good life. i also think that he has great self respect so you wont catch him doing anything and everything just to be recognized. eventho i dont know him personally, i do think he looks a bit exhausted and i hope he’s resting well rn. as much as i want more projects featuring him, i want him to be happy. we can still talk about him all the time on here and i’ll keep writing for him 😜

[night-unfurls-its-splendour]

Susan Kay's 'Phantom' Read: Part IV (Nadir)

I always knew I'd have mixed feelings about this chunk of the book.

I feel like the issues with the rampant Orientalism and just generally how very wrong Kay is about so much of this have been sufficiently commented on by others, so I'm not going to spend a lot of real estate on that. I'm mainly going to focus on what bugs me personally.

Which is... well, several things

Where do I start?

I guess with "Nadir" himself. I don't know who "Nadir" is, but he's #NotMyDaroga. 'Why's that?' You may ask? Well because, in my opinion, he's only tangentially related to his source material. There's a lot here that checks the boxes: Daroga of Mazanderan, reluctant with many of his duties, simultaneously in awe of and terrified of Erik’s genius all of that's in there. Buuuuut

First of all, Kay took the most practical, likeable character in Leroux's work and made him whiny and annoying. All he does for the first five pages is complain. Within those five pages he also refers to himself as "regrettably squeamish". Nothing happens in the course of this episode to show him growing out of that, so how we get the, pragmatic badass who haunts the Paris opera house keeping Erik in check I have no idea (I also have no idea how this is gonna go later in the book).

Not only that but this in particular stuck out to me:

Some of the illusions were positively supernatural, and long before the show was at an end, I was quietly convinced that I stood in the presence of a genie, created from fire more than two thousand years before Adam. I noted uneasily that he was left handed. Every Moslem knows that the devil is left handed--it is for this reason that we always take care to spit to the left. My fingers felt instinctively for the amulets that hung at my neck, an outstretched hand made in silver and the dried eye of a sheep, killed at Mecca on the great day of sacrifice. Both were powerful protective agencies, and I had never felt more in need of their protection. I took care not to meet his gaze, for I already feared his evil eye.

This stands in sharp contrast to the Persian of Leroux:

If I had been a superstitious man or easily susceptible to weakness, I could not have failed to think that I had to do with a siren of some sort whose task was to trouble the voyager bold enough to travel on the waters of the lakeside house; but, thank God, I come from a country where the fantastic is so cherished that we know it to its depths, and in times past I myself have studied it extensively. Anyone who knows the magicians trade can excite the human imagination with a few simple tricks.

Of course you can make the argument that the Persian speaking here has known Erik for years now and is wise to his tricks, whereas Kay's "Nadir" is seeing them for the first time. But I'm sorry. I don't buy it. Leroux's Daroga, though amazed and awestruck by Erik's skills at illusion, never indicates that he has even been so fooled by them as to actually mistake him for more than what he is: a genius, certainly, but no genie.

Which leads me to wonder if Erik's magic tricks in this book aren't a little too fantastic. Granted Kay never leads us to believe that they really are supernatural, but she uses Erik's degree of genius as a bit of a shield to get away with not revealing the secrets to some truly fantastic tricks, while Leroux nearly always explains Erik's mechanisms (whether they would work to the level of efficacy Leroux describes its up for debate, but he at least does have explanations for them all.

I think it's hilarious and contemptible that Kay has, at numerous times in this book, dropped incredibly clunky and gratuitous clusters of architectural technical terms, just lists of them for no apparent reason except, I can only assume, to show off how much research she did on the subject; and then makes it so patently obvious that her cultural research is dubious, negligible, or entirely non-existent.

She goes to great lengths to paint Nadir as a devout Muslim, which is not something Leroux ever did, now that I think about it. I don't doubt that the Persian is, at least culturally, be he seems quite ambivalent to his religion, as a rule. It quite literally (as far as I can recall) never comes up. But Nadir is. Several times she has him exclaim "Allah" much in the way a Westerner would use "God" as an expletive. Not "Wallah" not even "By Allah" just "Allah".

"Allah, how I hated cats!"

And it's not only the things he says but the things he doesn't say that annoy me (though I'm a layman, and very much open to correction). Common Islamic phrases that could easily be used in any of the situations Nadir finds himself in are completely left by the wayside. There isn't even a single "Inshallah" in his entire narrative.

Another problem I have is that Kay's Daroga is a widower with a sick son. A very complex emotional relationship develops among Erik, Nadir, and Nadir's son, Reza, to whom Erik feels an affinity, as the boy is slowly crippled by a debilitating congenital disease. I have a problem with this because its all very... I call it the Michael Burnham effect. That is to say this is a very important and big emotional thing in The Persian's relationship with Erik and I don't believe that this wouldn't have come up in any of the Persian's narrative if it was actually the case. This is a liberty which Kay, in my opinion, shouldn't have taken. It affects Erik's entire relationship with The Persian in ways that strain my credulity. And it's part of the reason that Erik's character here is fully beginning to stray deeper into a musical-based version than the Leroux-version (which I have a problem with, as this book is ostensibly following Leroux's outline). She even goes to far as to have Erik acknowledge Nadir, with complete (if reluctant) sincerity, as his friend. And this pretty much confirms my suspicions of where "Erik and Daroga are friends" comes from. Whatever Erik and The Persian's odd relationship in the book is, I can't call it friendship with how frequently The Persian calls him "the monster".

Note don't get me wrong Erik and Daroga do definitely have a bizarre bond that is, I think, a kind of friendship. Daroga feels sympathy for Erik, and also responsibility for him. He is, in many, ways, more like an older brother than a friend. I could say so much on this subject but that's for another post.

But what I find really baffling and annoying about Erik and Nadir's "friendship" in this book is the drugs.

I can't express how repugnant I find this. I think it's an insult to both Erik and the Persian, the fact that Nadir HIMSELF GETS ERIK HOOKED ON OPIUM. WHY. And then she has the fucking nerve to lampshade with all the "Oh yes Opium's a terrible horrible deadly habit" Only to have Nadir turn right around and give Erik his fix. What the actual fuck.

But setting aside that Susan Kay actually said "I'm not just going to make Nadir annoying, I'm also going to make him an enabler!" Is the fact that... I just don't buy Erik doing drugs.

I know Erik is an artist, and artists throughout the ages have been associated with decadent habits like drugs and alcohol to soothe their tortured souls or broaden their minds to ever more fantastic plains blah blah blah.

But Erik is not an every day kind of character. Erik is notable in how uniquely he glories in his tribulations. Erik's music in particular is a manifestation of his pure emotions both good and bad, and I think for him to alter his moods with substances, to him, would sully the purity of his art, which he always characterizes as a spiritual, almost holy thing.

And here's another thing. Part of the reason Erik is doing opium in this book is, yes the horrors of his past, but also the terrible things he's doing in the present... which I do think Erik of Leroux did grow sick of what was demanded of him in Persia (he explicitly says he wanted to put it all behind him), but I don't think he probably felt... that bad about it? I dunno maybe that's just me.

Moving on.

I'll pause here to say that while I think Kay is a bit guilty of "de-fanging" Erik in this book, I genuinely do appreciate her emphasis on his affinity for the weak and broken, and his knack with animals.

So now I come to one of the things that made me look most askance at this section. Again, the conceit of this book (or at least what I was given to understand the conceit was) is that its filling in the blanks that Leroux left vague. And I don't really know if that was Susan Kay's intention, but it's certainly how the Phandom took it. Which is why it bugs me when there are things in here that either don't quite jive with canon or straight up contradict it.

Now in terms of the canon of Leroux's actual book, we're not sure exactly which Shah employed Erik. Leonard Wolf point out that Leroux mentions Erik "[fighting] the Emir" and posits that he is referring to the Afghani-Persian war of 1837. This would put Erik’s age in PotO at about 60, assuming he was very young at the time (in his teens). That would make Erik's patron Mohammad Shah Qajar.

However M. Grant Kellermeyer (and most others writing about this period in Erik’s life, including Susan Kay) favour the idea that Erik’s patron was Mohammed's son, Nasser al din Shah Qajar.

When Erik and the Persian talk about the "Rosy Hours of Mazanderan" they both make mention of the "Little Sultana", who is described by Leroux's narrator in the epilogue as "the Shah-in-Shah's favourite", whose boredom was the Shah's impetus for sending the Persian to find Erik in the first place, and whose delight in bloodthirsty spectacles of torture and execution allowed Erik's talents in those areas to develop into a finely honed art.

Now I would take "the Little Sultana" to mean one of the Shah's wives, concubines, daughters, or even a sister.

But Kay, for some inexplicable reason, chooses to interpret this capricious (and bloodthirsty) female figure--the Shah's favourite--as his... mother.

Now Nasser al din Shah's mother was Malek Jahan Khanom, who, true to Kay's portrayal was Regent of Persia for one month (September 5th - October 5th) in 1848. Also like Kay's "Khanum", Malek was a formidable and politically savvy woman, and definitely not an individual you would want to cross.

I can't dispute the idea of the Khanom being an incredibly powerful figure, and the type you would need and want to keep appeased (she is described by Kay as keeping her son firmly under her thumb), but I have to look at the fact that Kay read "The Little Sultana, the Shah's Favourite" and really said, "Right. That'll be his mom" and squint a little bit.

On top of this, the Khanum is characterized as having a sexual obsession with Erik, very similar to the way Duchess Josiana is aroused by Gwynplaine's facial deformity in Victor Hugo's The Man Who Laughs, and is first irritated, then enraged by Erik's constant indifference. This fact is not lost on the Shah.

I just don't know ya'll. It's...I just... I don't know about this.

M. Grant Kellermeyer speculates that the "Little Sultana" Leroux refers to, to be the seventh wife of Nasser al din Shah, Jeyran, whom he first took as a mistress in around 1850 following a chance encounter during which he apparently fell in love with her on sight. One story of their meeting even asserts that she was one of his mother's servants.

If that is the case it would be one reason why Malek and Jeyran stood locked for years in stark political opposition to each other.

Jeyran was herself formidable and enjoyed many masculine pursuits including hunting and shooting, and not even the Khanom was able to dissuade Nasser from conferring her the title of Forough ol-Saltaneh, or from naming her son the crown prince (though this decision was stuck in political hell for years because of Jeyran's lack of influential blood-lines).

She was his favourite wife until her early death in 1860 at the age of 29.

It's my opinion that Leroux's "Little Sultana" is a composite of Jeyran and her successor as the Shah's favourite, Anis al-Dalweh, who was even more formidable and politically savvy than Jeyran. She was the only one of the Shah's wives known to share his meals and the only one he suffered to publicly criticize him, and she took over Malek's duties as the head of the harem upon her death in 1873.

Masterpost

[philsdrivinglicence]

Sorry to take this lighthearted post and be insane underneath it, you accidentally triggered a yap in me.

There's no way it hits the same. I was marinated in their no homo bs for almost a decade. I swear I was chemically changed the day Dan came out.

Anyone who joined phandom post coming out, I mean absolutely no disrespect, but you simply cannot understand how complex and frankly strained the creator/fan relationship became for many of us, post tatinof but pre-coming out.

I grew to have a sort of love/hate relationship with dnp. I came out before they did and it made me see the entire "phan" discourse in a totally different light.

(Coming out makes you see the whole world in a different light but that's a different conversation)

When I was closeted (and a child, 13-16ish) I was very - "it doesn't matter what we think, they are private people, they owe us nothing, speculation is fun but we should leave them alone. Yes, I privately agree they are a couple but for real guys leave them alone. And also we don't ACTUALLY KNOW they COULD be straight." While also being a total stalker myself - we all remember what was "acceptable" back then. The culture was very different.

After I came out, finished high school, and moved out I met more queer people and started to become almost, I guess, fed up? Tired of the "nothing to see here" of it all.

I thought - look at these two highly successful men, profiting from their (mostly) queer audience of women who have been fans since childhood. Why can't they just be honest? Why can't they be proud? How dare they hint at queerness while hiding behind a thin veil of hetero respectability? (My righteous, freshly minted university student era when I thought I knew everything and was a "proper adult" now. Cringe)

Mostly though, I felt sorry for them, especially Dan who was VISIBLY uncomfortable with public attention at this point, and while clearly still appreciating and loving his audience, seemed like he somehow simultaneously didn't feel he deserved us, and resented our attention.

I desperately, desperately wanted them to come out because I knew how good it was on the other side. How freeing and fulfilling. So when they did. I breathed a sigh of relief. When Dan left for his clearly much needed mental health break I was happy for him.

Watching Phil making videos during the "we don't talk about Dan" era was almost painful. (They are a bonded pair, do not seperate.) But for the best.

They pretty much abandoned an entire broadcast career on the BBC which was well on its way to making them household names in the UK. They had finally taken control of their own narrative. Rather than just seeing where the ride took them and saying yes to everything, they started directing their own careers. Good for them tbh. That takes way more balls than people realise.

All of that, and everything that came before is what makes this the most intense parasocial relationship I have with any celebrities.

It just hits crazy. I cannot fucking explain the feeling in my chest when they get to be that little bit more open, that little bit more relaxed because they were bound up so tight for so long, and it showed! Yes, you can go back and watch their old videos but watching the chains slowly loosen over years hits completely different.

Sorry for the big yap. Please consider this a stream of consciousness. But do you see the vision? Do you get me?

@ late stage phannies. This is not an attack, I am glad to have you with us and I love and respect you. I'm just feeling very emotional 🙈

what is this experience like for new phannies who didn't live through the "we aren't even friends we're just flatmates because it's convenient to live with another youtuber fyi i like vagina" era? is it hitting as hard for you?

[cominy-kiwami]

hmmm. beefswelling???

[junko-and-riri-domain]

warm embraces & sudden kisses | ot7

↬ ᴘᴀɪʀɪɴɢ: ot7 x reader ↬ ɢᴇɴʀᴇ: fluff | requested | drabbles/headcannons ↬ ᴡᴀʀɴɪɴɢs: none ↬ ʀᴇQᴜᴇꜱᴛᴇᴅ ʙʏ: anon ↬ ʀᴇQᴜᴇꜱᴛ ᴡᴀꜱ: “ENHA REACTION TO YOU KISSING THEM OUT OF NO WHERE OR JOW THE CUDDLE WITH YOU PLS AND THANK YOU 🙏” ↬ ᴀ/ɴ: 

since this is the 100th post on this blog I decided to do an ot7 one

simultaneously, this was a request so it worked out !!

anon said or but I decided to try & write both in here :$ so there’s kinda 2 mini scenarios for each member

also i wrote this on my phone in my notes while i was out today which is why everything’s lowercase :)

anon if you’d like me to rewrite this less as scenarios and more as bullet points just lmk!

Lee Heeseung

[a light’s on in the kitchen]

you wake up with the feeling of warmth no longer around you. looking around, you see that heeseung’s no longer in bed with you. your hand makes it way to your phone on your nightstand, 3:07 am greets your eyes and you hear faint sounds from outside the room. you get up with a yawn, the haze of sleepiness still on you as you make your way around the apartment the two of you share, a light’s on in the kitchen. he’s making ramen, you think to yourself. he stands tall by the stove, your footsteps are quiet as you hear him singing a song. when you get to him, your arms arm around his waist as he turns around to greet you, you jump up to give him a quick kiss, intending to meet his lips but because of how tall he is, your lips meet his cheek. he smiles, pulls you in closer to him, tilting up your chin but teases you by pressing a kiss to the top of your head.

[finally home]

you’re nestled up on the couch while a movie plays on the tv. today wasn’t a good day, to say the least. you woke up late which didn’t give you a chance to eat breakfast with heeseung, when you ordered lunch the fries were burnt and the food undercooked, and when you got home heeseung texted you to let you know that practice was running a little late which meant he wouldn’t get to have dinner with you. your eyes stayed settled on the tv until the sound of the apartment door greets your ears, bringing you out of that movie marathon haze you were trapped in. heeseung smiles as he sees you, makes his way to you, as he hands you a takeout bag.

“i bought some food on my way home, i’ll change and then we can eat, yeah?” he notices that you’re sad but doesn’t press you on about it. you nod, taking the bag from him. when he comes back, the two of you eat while a new movie is running. when you’ve finished all the food, his arm wraps around your shoulders and his head rests on top of yours.

“you ok?” he asks. his embrace is comforting and safe, similar to what it feels like when a blanket is draped over you just before you fall asleep.

“i am now that you’re finally home.”

rest of the boys under the cut !!

Park Jongseong / Jay

[flustered and red]

jay’s making dinner in the kitchen while you’re setting the table. you hear him chattering, more to himself than anything as he tries to make dinner the best that it can be. with how busy his schedule was and how much you’ve been swamped with your own work, the two of you haven’t had much time for each other. so, the you both having a free day today was something you were definitely going to take full advantage of. after setting the table, you head into the kitchen to see him slicing up lettuce for a last minute salad. you let out a smile as you see him make a honey based dressing and decided to surprise him by hugging him from behind. usually, he does it to you. despite his confident appearance and composure, you can already tell that he’s getting all flustered and red.

“Yah, who said you can sneak up on me like that!” he says, but makes no effort to pull away. You move so that you’re in front of him,

“If that’s how you react when I hug, how will you react when I do this?” Going on your tiptoes, your arms make their way around his neck as you feel the softness of his lips on yours. Guess honey was good as moisturizer…

[i built us a house]

jay was sitting in his gaming chair, his gaming set up in its own room while you were in the living room doing your own thing. while you were typing away on your laptop you hear your name being called, causing you to look up.

“i wanna show you something,” he said.

“i’m busy, hon,” you reply.

“real quick, i promise.” you sigh, knowing damn well jay wasn’t going to leave you alone until you went with him. so, following him into his game room he sat on his chair.

“why am i here?” you asked. he patted his lap, motioning for you to sit on him. as you did, one of his hands moves your hair to the other side while an arm stays settled on you. you can feel his breath on your neck, the butterflies in your stomach now doing somersaults.

“i built us a house.” your eyes look at the screen to see it on his minecraft server as his character walks around. you smile, turn your head so you’re looking at him,

“this is our house?”

“one day i’ll make it happen in real life.” despite the large promise, deep down you knew jay was going to find some way to make it a reality.

Sim Jaeyun / Jake

[just a little more]

you were on the living room couch, layla’s head on your lap while you pet her. as you do, you’re typing on your phone with your free hand. jake makes his presence known by sitting next to you, his head popping into your line of sight. you set your phone aside, smiling as you pat his hair. he frowns,

“you’ve been giving layla your attention all day, what about me?”

“layla’s cuter than you,” you reply with a teasing smile. he frowns, sighing slightly as he looks at the sight of all your attention on layla. jake heads to your room, glad that you loved layla as much as he did but wished you loved him just a little more. you head to the room, seeing jake seated by the edge of the bed, you settled yourself so that you were sitting on his lap, your legs around his waist.

“i want your attention too.”

“someone’s jealous.”

“naur, i’m not jealous,” he says, looking away. you lean forwards, pressing a kiss to his lips that lingers on for a few seconds longer than it should.

“yaur, ya are,” you tease. he smiles, kisses you again as his grip on you tighten slightly,

“it got you here, didn’t it?”

[a pair of fuzzy socks]

you’re half asleep when you feel warmth to your feet and suddenly a pair of fuzzy socks have been placed over them. you say nothing, wanting to go back to sleep more than anything. a few seconds later, you feel a dip on the bed, two actually, and you’re aware of both jake and layla around you. jake lifts up your head gently. you hear him whisper,

“layla, don’t wake up your mother,” and the feeling brings tingles to your heart, fireworks spreading throughout your body. he snuggles closer to you, intertwining his legs with yours as he traces random patterns on your back just before falling asleep.

Park Sunghoon

[cold]

for as long as he could remember, park sunghoon has lived life cold. on the ice he was cold. towards people he acted cold. you entering his life was like the sun rising after a freezing winter night. you were the heat that rid himself of the icicles stuck to his cold exterior. you melted the snowflakes of winter and turned them into roses of spring. you were the warmth he never knew he was missing. he was in your apartment, washing the dishes after you made lunch. you headed to him placing your hand on his arm. he looked over to you, smiling as you hugged his side. you leaned up as you kissed him, he couldn’t hold back his small laugh. as he felt your lips on his, heat rose to his cheeks. but despite the shyness in him about to take over, he fights it, leaning into you and kissing you once more.

[cold hands]

sunghoon has always had cold hands. and whenever he cuddled with you, he made sure that you knew it. the two of you were joking, running around the apartment when you and sunghoon both ended up on the bed. a glint appeared in his eyes, a plan forming in his head. the tips of his fingers met your stomach as you started bursting out in laugher.

“HOON WHY DO YOU HAVE COLD HANDS,” you yelled as you tried to fight him off. he smiled, vampire teeth showing in all their glory as he settled next to you in bed. his hand rested on your stomach as he brought you to him, his cold feet pressing to yours.

“you’re my personal heater,” he said, pulling you closer to him.

Kim Sunoo

[a little too close]

sunoo has always been clingy around you. some days, he’ll grab your hand out of nowhere and start fiddling with your fingers. at the most random times, he’ll play with your hair and think about how to style it. being in sunoo’s embrace is something that you’ve always welcomed. you were sort of the opposite, accepting and welcoming his touch but never really initiating it. until, today that is. you noticed someone talking to sunoo getting a little too close to him. you didn’t think much of it knowing how friendly sunoo was towards people and how others naturally gravitated to him. but, you couldn’t help yourself when you made your way to them and held onto sunoo’s hand, practically staring down the other person. sunoo smiled, intertwining your hands together while bringing you into the conversation. unsurprisingly, the outsider moved closer and without even thinking, you kissed sunoo’s cheek. his eyes slightly got wide as he looked at you, but it was an action he was glad for. in return, he kissed your cheek with a smile and couldn’t stop talking about it for the rest of the day.

[a tough day]

you were having somewhat of a tough day, having cramps, on and off headaches, and an annoying ringing in your ears that you just couldn’t get rid of. sunoo came home to find you layed on the couch, his heart breaking at the sight. he got some things and brought it to the living room,

“what are you doing?” you asked.

“spa day!” he replied excitedly. he rubbed lotion on your hands, placed cucumbers on top of your eyes, and combed out your hair. the night came to an end with you and sunoo laying on the couch together, him patting in the face mask then rubbing soothing circles on your stomach. with sunoo came a bubble of warmth you never wanted to leave.

Yang Jungwon

[make me]

jungwon’s in a playful mood today and with that playful mood comes teasing you. you’re in the living room where he decided to grab your sketchbook and hold it up above your head.

“won, give it back!” you exclaimed in annoyance, glaring at him. he has the audacity to look amused and he tells you,

“make me.” he’s always found joy in teasing you for your height and right now was no different. a plan forms in your head as you take some steps backwards. as you practically run to him, his eyes widen with fear as he’s forced to let go of your sketchbook to catch you and you end up latched onto him like a koala. you kiss him, in those few seconds the entire world stops and it’s as if no one but him exists. the kiss lingers on a second or two longer than you intended as jungwon’s grip on you tightens so that you don’t fall. on his face you see him smiling and those dimples that you’ve always loved appear. jungwon was never good at hiding his emotions, his love for you no different. you close your eyes as he leans down, you expect a kiss returned but instead, he kisses the top of your head. lightly flicking your forehead gently,

“that’s what you get for being short,” he says.

[i'm here]

with all his responsibilities and the things jungwon needs to take care of at such a young age, coming home to you is the one constant in his life. to him, the second he’s able to wrap his arms around you, revel in the scent of your shampoo, and gets to hold you, everything is just complete. at 1:06 am, he came home. it was late, he was exhausted and all he wanted to do was sleep. he headed into the room you two shared, only to see you still awake.

“you’re up?” he asked.

“no, i’m asleep,” you reply sarcastically. he sighs, setting into bed next to you, “someone’s tired,” you said.

“i want cuddles,” he mutters unable to hide his need for your affection. you shift and his head lays on your shoulder. you run your hand through his hair while you kiss the top of his head,

“i’m here.”

Nishimura Riki / Ni-ki

[bungeo to his ppang]

more than anything, ni-ki liked to be by your side. whether it was while he was watching something on his phone, showing you a new dance routine, or asking you to dye his hair, as long as you were just with him, he was happy. sleeping is something that ni-ki has always enjoyed, how could he not when it grants him a few moments of peace before a busy day? the two of you are in the car, he rests his head on your shoulders. unlike normal, he doesn’t fall asleep this time. he pretends to, he closes his eyes, stays still while enjoying your warmth, but he’s not actually asleep. you didn’t seem to notice, he feels you messing with his hair a bit, something he’s never minded as long as it was with you. he hears you talking about how cute he is, practically fangirling over him. he feels you kiss the top of his head lightly,

“sleep well, ni-kitty,” he hears you whisper. he doesn’t move, doesn’t show any sign that he’s affected by your sudden actions of love. but deep down, he feels a happiness around you that’s greater than how he feels when he’s on stage. when he performs he enjoys the thousands of eyes that watch him but all he thinks about are how your eyes look at him with adoration and pride. it was in this moment that he knew, you were the bungeo to his ppang.

[take a break]

after dinner, you’re sitting on the floor of the table in front of the tv, trying to get some work done. suddenly, you feel a weight on your lap. you look down to see ni-ki’s head on your lap, his eyes closed but he’s clearly still awake.

“yah, get off,” you said, slightly lifting up your leg.

“no.” you roll your eyes, deciding not to pay attention to him as you go back to sleep our work. it seems that ni-ki had other plans as he took your one of your hand and starting fiddling with it.

“ni-ki, i’m busy.”

“take a break,” he said. you look down at ni-ki… how could you refuse? you put away your things, shifting so that your full attention was now on him. he smiled up at you, fiddling with the edge of your clothes while saying the most random things that made you laugh.

↬ ᴀ/ɴ pt. 2:

if anyone’s read up to this point pls lmk how it was, i’m not really good with ot7 scenarios typa things 😭

❦ written by riri @enhykkul | blog masterlist

requests are currently open! rules can be found here | anon emojis

[iguessitsjustme]

Moonlight Chicken Ep 1 & 2 Thoughts

Very long. Under the cut

-Day two of playing catch up and I learned there are TWO episodes of this show out right now so I guess I’m gonna liveblog both. Can’t wait until I can turn off the filter for this tag. 

-Not how I was expecting this show to start. This feels a little too real right now oof. 

-This man has given out so much money just in the first 3 minutes of the show. Is he actually financially stable enough to be doing that?

-What is this? Instalove? That phone is not on. That was just a black screen. That was a whole lot of staring for a first meeting. 

-I have thoughts on this opening but I do not know what they are. I can’t articulate it. Was this the MV they did? This song? I have many thoughts. 

-“I can get a better price for kidneys” what a weird thing to say. 

-Handing someone a can of beer has never before been so gay. 

-I should not be watching this while hungry. Where are my snacks?

-Eeeewww the vomit sounds. Ew. I am no longer hungry. Gross. 

-If you’re sober, don’t kiss him with your vomit mouth. Please dear god don’t kiss him with your vomit mouth. 

-Oh look at that. They fucked. 

-A CAT. Oh that cat LOVES him. I love this. Can this show just be Mix petting the cat? I think I might need to make a trip to my parent’s house soon just to see their cats. 

-That bench looks uncomfortable. If we all work together we can get that man some better furniture. 

-I like this chicken vendor lady. She’s my favorite character so far. 

-This show simultaneously has so much happening and not enough happening. 

-They keep calling him old. How old is Earth? How old is the character he’s playing? Earth is 29. I guess he must seem old to all of those young twenty-somethings. But how old is his character? I should learn these names. It will take me a few episodes though. 

-They both keep thinking about how good it was. This means it’s about to get messy. 

-He’s definitely gonna get stopped by the police at some point. 

-I’m not entirely sure what chicken rice is but it want it. 

-DEAF CHARACTER. Who is understandably annoyed and frustrated. 

-His name is Heart??? Oh that’s so cute. 

-How is this episode still going? I feel like I’ve been watching for three years. I mean I’m enjoying it but also this show is kind of dragging in the first episode while the plot is being set up. I’m betting I don’t think this in the later episodes. 

-Li has probably already treated Heart better than his parents just by saying that he’s using his deafness as an excuse and Li is actually seeing him as more of a person in that instance than Heart’s parents. That sounds bad the way I phrased it but I bet that Heart has been acting out since he became deaf and his parents just excuse everything he’s doing.

-And there’s the end of episode 1. I’m just gonna dive into episode 2. Actually I’m not. I’m gonna heat up some leftovers first I am hungry. 

-Pizza squired. Now it’s no chicken rice but it is pretty damn good. Now episode 2. I genuinely have no idea what’s going to happen. 

-Now what do I gotta do to get one of those aprons that says “hungry?” I need it. 

-I am not a fan of this opening. Why does it end on a photo montage? Also I have thoughts on this song. It’s fine but I don’t think it’s a good opening song.

-WHERE HAVE I SEEN HER BEFORE? Oh she was in many things. But I recognize her from 55:15. I never finished that show. But she was my favorite character. 

-Oh his nephew has a difficult relationship with him. Why is Jim raising him? What happened? Why does his nephew have an issue with Wen working there? I want these family dynamics and I want them now. 

-These two are doing an excellent enemies to lovers. They did excellent with pining. Now they’re doing excellent here. My favorites. 

-That apron also has a chicken in it. I need it. 

-Heart and Li own my soul. They’re adorable. I’m glad Heart apologized. 

-CAT. ITS BACK. It’s very obvious that both Earth and Mix know how to handle cats. 

-What’s with GMMTV and pregnancy lately? 

-To be fair, he bought those cigarettes before they knew she was pregnant. I’m not a fan of cigarettes but he definitely bought those before they knew of the pregnancy. 

-I want that fruit. I need it. I would like to be eating that fruit right now.

-Did that boy just say America is affordable???? Not my America that’s for sure. 

-Aw Heart has a a big ol crush on Li. I love them. 

-Well I could have guessed and I did but Heart’s mom sucks. 

-Those people on the motorcycle. Where are their helmets? Where were they driving? Into the wall? My bullshit meter is going off. 

-There aren’t enough bats?? My guy the window is absolutely covered in bats. 

-This beer sure is getting their money’s worth for product placement. 

-ALMOST 40??? They really got Earth out here playing characters ten years older than his age. What’s with that. 

-Jim saying he’s not fit to be anyone’s home while he’s busy being everyone’s home. Someone come take care of Jim too. Or at least help ease his burden.

-I don’t know what to make of this show. All I know is I want more Heart and Li. 

[hms-no-fun]

this isn't a question but i love how you write terezi. one scene that stands out to me for some reason is the one between her and karkat in gf3 where its simultaneously v telling of the similarities between her and june, and their conflict. but while also showing the shift in her friendships (like with karkat) & also how she grapples with her mind powers & relationships on the whole. i guess i'd love to hear any thoughts u had while writing that chapter!

aaaaaaaa thank you!!! that was a really tough chapter to write and i wasn't sure how it would land at all. 3.1 has obviously been in production for a long time now but ch6 definitely went through the most revisions. i have an 80 page doc of scrapped/modified sections and i think a solid half of that is variations on that scene. karkat and terezi's relationship is really interesting to me particularly because there's a tenacious sect of the fandom that still ships karezi despite them both being two very canonically homosexual characters. there's like a ghostly pressure i feel when i brush up against a popular ship that i think is fun to toy around with, i really enjoy proving those people wrong :p

you could say that gf2 is about the importance of having people around you who speak the same emotional language, and there's this really radical positivity to june and terezi's relationship at the start that is the result of many mitigating circumstances. but that last scene of gf2, with the two of them sitting on their new porch and chatting... idk man that always struck me as melancholy and kind of ominous?

like besides the existence of silverbark i think this scene is what compelled me most to push on to gf3, which might come as a surprise since the scene PROBABLY feels pretty tame? but there's just something about it, as i was writing it, there was some real one-sided tension going on. terezi wanted to say something else but couldn't. which, you know, historically? not a great sign.

i think there is this really unhealthy dynamic between june and terezi that never had the opportunity to boil up to the surface in gf2 because of how short the time frame of that story was. but now the honeymoon period is decidedly over, some months have passed and they've mostly fallen back into old habits. i won't speak too much to what's going through terezi's head though because that will be explored more at length in the text later on! but i think it's safe to say she's having a bad time.

honestly a lot of this side of gf3 grew out of my frustration with how the fandom viscerally hates on vriska for the bad things she did, but somehow terezi gets a pass because... what, because she's a cop? because she's doing it for some fascistic notion of "justice"? bro she knew her best friend was being groomed and stalked by an older man and when her best friend fucked up her first response was to SNITCH TO SAID OLDER MAN WITH EVERY EXPECTATION THAT HE WOULD MURDER HER IN COLD BLOOD, WHICH HE ALMOST DOES. 3.1 ch1 goes from the boardroom scene with june to june reliving that last conversation vriska had with terezi before she snitched to doc scratch specifically because i think it's really representative of a lot of the shit going on between both vrisrezi and junerezi. beneath the lovey dovey transbian surface is a truly unhealthy refusal on terezi's part to ever cede ground to anyone she decides is an "opponent." except vriska!!

the key to writing good terezi imo is understanding that her vocal certitude in all things is 100% a front. she latches onto ideas of a system of justice because it gives her a moral structure that she can hang her coat on, that tells her what is right and what is wrong in unambiguous terms that she can just trust implicitly. vriska and terezi both do awful awful things in act 5, but the difference between them is that vriska KNOWS what she's doing is bad and just doesn't have a choice because of her psychic spidermom, so she covers that guilt up in layers upon layers of fantasy and abstraction and gameification. terezi meanwhile thinks that everything she does is justified because she's a legislacerator! and that is in my opinion WAY WORSE in the longterm!!!

i think she does this because internally she has no idea what the fuck is going on and is terrified of losing control or being confronted with her shortcomings or ever having to admit that she's wrong. she clings to this idea of justice even long after losing faith in the alternian system of justice in specific because the alternative is living in a chaotic and lawless universe, which is fucking ego death for a seer of mind. and that's THE vein i was trying to tap into in 3.1 ch6 and 7, and partly what made them so difficult to write, because the thing is unlike a lot of these other melodramatic bitches terezi absolutely will not say what she's thinking. she will lie and deflect and pull rhetorical reversals to force herself out of the conversational spotlight every single time if given the opportunity.

what made those chapters doubly more difficult to write was that dave and karkat are also extremely bad at talking about their feelings. so this led to a series of scenes where no one can actually talk about what they're talking about! which is fucking MADDENING!!!

but that's exactly why i wanted to get them all together for a little while. i think terezi is in this really difficult place where she feels stagnant in her own life and rather than processing that like a mature adult, she's doing what she always does which is lash out rudely and often violently at the people she actually cares most about. because i think on some level she wants them to prove her wrong? like she goes into that conversation with karkat so sure about how it's going to go, and then completely fucking whiffs it and almost gives herself a concussion. but she STILL can't really admit what's going on deep down, because if she stated it outright in simple terms she would have no choice but to admit that she's kind of an asshole, to put it mildly. like she wants other people to prove her wrong, but she's also constitutionally incapable of accepting any reality where she could be wrong. so it just becomes this self-destructive downward spiral until she winds up... well, wherever chapter 8 takes her :')

so i think terezi goes to davekat's place because she thinks they're both gonna be easy targets, right? like she thinks she can just walk all over these stupid boys and work her frustrations out on them and then, like, go back home and pretend nothing happened? but what i really like about my version of davekat in this context is that they have matured a lot. it's implied that karkat has been at the very least reading ABOUT leftist theory, and while dave's been isolating from everyone and feels deep shame about his recently acquired feline features, i think you can see a level of maturity in the way he talks that wasn't present before. and it was really important to me that dave and karkat are like... they're sleeping in separate rooms and not spending a lot of time together right now, but they aren't separated. i like to think they had some heated arguments but ultimately decided they still prefer each others' company than being completely alone. they still love each other. and i think terezi is infuriated a little when she notices that, because it's a degree of compromise she can't even begin to comprehend at this point in her life.

uhhhhhhhh so this wound up being kind of a gloomy overview of terezi as a character so i want to end this ask a little more upbeat by posting an EXCLUSIVE DELETED SCENE that i tried really really really fucking hard to get into gf3 and just couldn't. originally ch6 was going to open with terezi barging in on dave, karkat, and jake's biweekly movie day. one of the more revelatory bits i wrote in 2.3 was the brief conversation between dave and jake where they're trading dirk stories. they have a fun dynamic that's basically never explored in homestuck proper!! so i had every intention of expanding on that in 3.1, but alas there just wasn't time. maybe someday...

i included those parenthetical notes at the end to show my process a little. i'll write a dialog scene and get up to a momentary stopping point, and then if i have ideas for stuff that happens in/around there i'll drop these parentheticals in as a reminder. actually rereading this i have a feeling i'm gonna find a way to reuse it anyway but we've come too far to turn back now!!!

[itsclydebitches]

re: that ask you posted a couple days ago about the male and female representation in RWBY, part of what makes RWBY's whole 'girl power' thing ring exceptionally hollow to me is the fact that there are like... no women in positions of real power in remnant. like at all. except the big bad.

winter is second in command to james. glynda is second in command to ozpin. all of the headmasters are men (for no discernible reason, imo; why theodore and not dorothea?). the leader of the ace ops was a white man (and then winter seemed to take over clover's position instead of either of the women of color on the team, and she was still second to james). RWBY is an all girl team, but JNPR was led by a boy despite a girl arguably being far more qualified (pyrrha). the happy huntresses are all women, and robyn had no real power to speak of--she didn't even manage to win the election, because jacques rigged it, and then the council ceased to matter. there was one (1) woman on the council, but she was so inconsequential that i can't even remember her name. (i suppose we're lucky it was the guy and not her who james shot lol) jacques controls the SDC instead of willow, even though he's not even a schnee by blood and actually married into the family for power. (and we don't even know how he got it over his wife.)

and then there's the white fang, which ghira led and not kali--and it's ghira who leads menagerie itself, while kali seems to be a housewife. sienna had five minutes of screentime before being brutally killed and her position assumed by adam, a man. cordovin is basically a one off lackey we haven't even thought about before or since. neo was second to roman. you have cinder, sure, who is a second but to salem, a woman, and raven as the leader of the branwen tribe--but what does it really say about your 'girl power' narrative when the only women with genuine systemic power in your world are villains or antagonists with massive bodycounts??

atla has the same sort of problem--a couple great female characters, but all the leadership positions are men (except the kyoshi warriors, an all girls group, and even then the leader of their island is an old man) and the one female mentor figure also turns out to be evil--but it at least has some great writing to help overlook that fact, and it came out in the mid-00's and so has some sort of excuse of being a product of its time. but rwby didn't even start until 2013 and it's still going and still making these kinds of decisions well into 2021.

where is this supposed girl power, exactly? am i really supposed to overlook the very patriarchal worldbuilding just because the title characters are girls?

That's an excellent summary of the situation, anon, and as with so much in RWBY, it comes down to the full context. Any one of these examples isn't necessarily going to mean much on its own. It's when you look at the pattern that you can start making a case for those conclusions: Why is the show marketed on "girl power" set in a world where men hold the vast majority of that power? And, more importantly, why is that setup not the point? We could easily have a story where that lopsided gender dynamic is the problem that the girls are looking to fix, but... that story doesn't exist. Like the problems discussed with Jaune, the supposed point here exists only on the surface. Dig just the tinniest bit — the above — and you hit on a lot of structural problems with this "girl power" world.

To add just a few details to what you've already said:

Salem indeed has power, but she's never allowed to fully use it. Each volume the frustration with this grows as Salem accumulates more abilities and then just sits on them. From literally hiding out for a thousand years to worries that she won't use the Staff in Volumes 9-10, Salem really isn't allowed to be the threat she's presented as on the surface. And yes, this is absolutely due in part to the "She's too OP and the writers don't know how to let her be that powerful while still having the heroes win" issue, but again, context. That problem doesn't exclude others occurring simultaneously.

Same double explanation with Summer. Yes, dead moms are an incredibly common trauma to dump on a protagonist, but it still left Yang and Ruby with Tai as their primary influence. And Qrow. The uncle becomes the extended family influence while Raven is the absent one/eventual antagonist. It's personal power as opposed to political power, but Tai, Qrow, Ozpin, formerly James... most of the mentors are men. Maria, a key exception, has been ignored in that regard. The story announced that she was Qrow's inspiration, setup her being Ruby's new mentor, and then... nothing. Nothing has come of that. She disappeared for a volume and then went off to Amity and was literally forgotten by the story when evacuating everyone was the finale's whole point.

Like that Endgame moment I mentioned, the Happy Huntresses feel a little too forced to me. Yes, it's the same basic idea as in ATLA, but ATLA, as you say, has a lot more going for it. The Happy Huntresses feel... on the nose? Idk exactly how to explain it. Like, "Here they are! Another team of all women! Isn't this how progressive storytelling works? Just ignore how this is a one-off team of minor characters compared to the world building issues discussed above." And if you're not paying attention, you miss just how insignificant they are, with a side of Robyn being, well, Robyn. The Kyoshi Warriors, at least, are based off of Kyoshi. A woman avatar who is a significant part of their history. That is, presumably, why they're an all women warrior group (but who notably still teach Sokka). The Happy Huntresses are all huntresses because...? There's no reason except that meta "We want to look progressive" explanation. Just like having all the women superheroes team up for a hot second so people get excited and ignore the representation problems across, what? 21 films? Don't get me wrong, I love that May is among the Happy Huntresses. I think including her in the explicitly all-women group was one of the better things RWBY has done in a long time, but the rest is still a mess.

RWBY is arguably about these smaller groups as opposed to systematic power (despite the writers trying to work that in with things like the White Fang and the election. Not to mention the implication that everything in Atlas is fine now that evil Ironwood has died and taken the symbol of wealth (the city) with him. We saw a human holding hands with a faunus after all. Racism and corruption solved, I guess.) So yes, our group is dominated by women... but Whitley is the one saving Nora, helping to defeat the Hound (plus Willow), thinking of the airships, and providing the blueprints they need to escape. Salem is our Big Bad, except Ironwood is the one the volume focuses on. Ruby is our leader, but Jaune is the one leading the group into the whale and getting praised for how heroic he is. Ren does more to shake things up, even if he's painted as the one in the wrong. Oscar gets to confront Salem and destroys the whale threat. Ozpin provides the information they need to evacuate. Meanwhile, when the girls do things in Volume 8 it's almost always followed by a long-stint of passiveness. Nora opens the door so she can be unconscious for most of the volume. Penny keeps Amity up so she can also be unconscious for a good chunk of time. Ruby sends her message and then sits in a mansion. Blake fights so she can tearfully beg Ruby to save her. Weiss, as said, takes a backseat to Whitley (and Klein). They forward the plot, absolutely, but comparatively it doesn't feel like enough.

It's that pattern then, no one specific example. More and more the personal power, not just the systematic power already built into Remnant, seems to be coming from the men. Not all the time, but enough that scenes like the tea drinking moment feel like a part of a much larger problem. Pietro taking control, Watts hacking, and Ambrosius literally remaking her when Penny is supposed to already be in control of herself and her fate. Winter being presented as the active mentor to Weiss, only to turn around and claim that Ironwood was actually responsible for everything. Ruby, Weiss, Blake, and May straight up commenting on how awful things are out there while Yang, Jaune, Ren, and Oscar lead the charge against Salem — with the latter three doing the most to forward that mission (no fear, semblance, cane). As others have only half-joked, Yang's supposedly badass moment was bringing up a mother she's ignored for six volumes and briefly blowing up the immortal woman for a couple of seconds (with Ironwood's bombs). Even Marrow is arguably the most significant Ace Op after Clover. Vine isn't actually a character, Elm slightly less so, Harriet is there to go crazy and try to drop a bomb (notably before admitting to never-before-existed feelings for Clover), but Marrow? He's the one who breaks out. Who is meant to heroically stand up against Ironwood. Who comments on how awful it is that teenagers are fighting and, regardless of how messed up the moral messages are, is supposedly pushing for active change while all the women in his group, including Winter, insist on maintaining the status quo. Look at all these choices as a whole, it makes throwaway worldbuilding choices like "All the Maidens are women" feel pretty hollow. Why does it matter if Amber is a Maiden if she dies in a flashback so Ozpin can struggle to pass on the power? If Pyrrha dies before becoming one so Jaune can angst about it? If Raven is one and then disappears from the story entirely? If Winter has enough power to break Ironwood's aura, but supposedly had no power throughout every other choice she made getting here? If Penny is one, but is continually controlled by men and then asks another man to help her die? It's just really unconvincing, once you look past the surface excitement of a woman looking cool with magic powers.

When you do consider the whole of the story — both in terms of our world building and who is forwarding the plot in the latter volumes, getting the emotional focus, being proactive, etc. — there are a lot of problems that undermine the presumed message RT wants to write. They say, "girl power" by marketing RWBY with these four women, but too many of the storytelling decisions thoroughly undermine that, revealing what's likely a deeply ingrained, subconscious bias.

[kaisa-ryo]

Itadori Yuji NSFW Alphabet

Warning: English isn't my native language!

☆.。.:*・°☆.。.:*・°☆.。.:*・°☆.。.:*

A = Aftercare (What he likes after sex)

Itadori likes to chat for a long time. Topics for communication are usually very diverse: from listing the different sex positions he wants to try, to discussing brands of cars, televisions, types of soaps and colors of underwear. In parallel, Yuji will stroke your back, causing your body to creep. So the love attraction that you already experienced with him before suddenly takes on a special intensity. When he has a need to receive your affection, he will begin to sink under the covers until he rests his nose against your chest or stomach. By this action, he asks you to play with his hair. At this moment, he may stop talking altogether, because instead of chatting, he will hum with pleasure. In addition, he will try with all his might and in various positions to snuggle up to you with his strong male body. And you will begin with great skill to stroke his hair and gradually increase the pressure in order to induce real ecstasy in him.

B = Body part (His favorite body part)

Obviously the hips and butt.

It is a blissful feeling when he squeezes your buttocks as he continuously enters you. And in the morning, when you start looking in the mirror, you notice that your thighs are scarlet. As you examine yourself, Itadori in the next room sees your stunned expression in the mirror and smiles proudly.

C = Cum (Everything about sperm)

He usually ends up on the aforementioned body parts. Although he experiences no less high pleasure when he watches how his hot semen flows down from your vagina. Or the mouth. And if you also swallow his seed, it will completely discourage him. It's so awkward and at the same time arousing when a girl literally lets a part of you into her. It's like you start making it a part of yourself. The part of his soul that passes through your body, moving on to the next stage of orgasm.

D = Dirty secret

To tell you the truth - there are a lot of them. Despite the fact that he almost always speaks with you frankly on intimate topics.

He often thinks about how he will kick you through the school desk and fuck you under the light of the graceful sunset that falls through the half-open blinds.

About how madly tempting it would be if you suck him off somewhere in the closet.

How to fuck you by the sea on soft sand.

There is no limit to these secret desires. Someday he will definitely tell you about all of them. And, of course, it will.

E = Experience

The highest level of experience in intercourse is masturbation. Yes, he has seen a lot of different videos on porn sites and instant messengers. And of course, he remembers them every single one. He has a lot of sexual fantasies. And they are all related to you. But they need to be implemented.

It will also ask you about your experience. For example, can you do a blow job. If you do not know about any sexual arts, he will certainly show you a video, explain how and what to do, ask if you like this objectively.

You can even say that he has much more indirect experience than you. But Yuji likes it. I like to teach you everything that he himself knows from the erotic videos he has watched.

F = Favorite position

In general, you have tried an innumerable number of poses all the time, but none can compare with the one when he presses you into bed from behind. When your penis plunges into the innermost and holds you so tightly that it begins to seem as if it has completely absorbed you.

G = Goofy (Are you serious at this moment?)

In most cases, yes. Even if this is not the first time you have been doing this, this does not mean that intercourse may not go well. But sometimes passionate excitement can outweigh all expressions of seriousness and turn it into entertainment or stress relief.

H = Hair (Is the hair ok?)

Not that he regularly tidies them up, but tries to make sure that both of you are comfortable. Maybe he prefers not to show it, but Itadori is really worried that you will be uncomfortable. Although the hair itself does not really interfere.

I = Intimacy (Romance)

Yes. And a lot.

Itadori literally melts when he sees you smile, the reason for which is his sweet and romantic actions. For him, there is no line between "boyfriend" and "spouse". And, of course, he regularly scrolls in his head how you have a large shared apartment, wedding rings, children ...

The guy is ready to even get you the moon from the sky, just to see your charming smile once again, to feel how you jump on his neck and say that you love him with all your heart. Sometimes he gets carried away - and then his hand reaches out to you to stroke your cheek, circle around your neck, say some banality, without which it is difficult for you to live. And sometimes you think that at such moments Itadori... looks a little more naive. But he does not see anything wrong with this and continues to cherish you, like the most priceless treasure on earth.

J = Jack off (masturbation)

It happens. And even after the start of your relationship.

In moments when you are far away, he records your telephone conversation, asks you to throw off your photos, turns on a home video taken once secretly from you ... then he starts "playing with his snake", quietly moaning your name. And if you start writing or talking on the phone, how much you want him now, it will just go crazy, imagining how he is fucking you on the bed right now. After all, it is such a pleasure to realize that your body receives only what you so passionately dream about and what you want.

— Mnh... yes, y/n... please continue...

K = Kink (Kinks and fetishes)

As mentioned earlier — home video. Yuji prefers to do this in secret, since he knows it will embarrass you. And besides, you will immediately guess why he does it.

He also has one fetish that you know about. Namely — voyeurism. When you change clothes, stand in the shower, or try on a swimsuit, he closely monitors your actions while standing outside the door. So he initiates you into his intimate world, where you can become his muse.

In addition, he has several types of perversions that he considers esoteric. For example, he really loves to admire your naked body and inhale its aroma, starting from the neck. This also applies to your personal things — your scent is also felt on them, and Itadori constantly examines and sniffs your things, hoping to feel your scent. It's kind of like a drug for him, and he likes to wake up in the morning and feel that your hair is still felt on his neck. And if you put on his clothes... it seems like some kind of new fetish. Now on his things your next smell. It's fucking exciting...

L = Location (Favorite places to have sex)

It makes no difference. The place does not depend on the amount of pleasure received from the process. True, you still have to find compromises. Because if it is convenient for him to hold your legs, simultaneously entering your bosom again and again, then it is quite problematic for you to be in the air, holding on to his shoulders. Thus, you get less pleasure. But do not think, he is not a rabbit, to fuck you wherever he wants, the guy will definitely ask if you want it. And yes, he does have a line between "normal" and "too public."

M = Motivation

All your movements are in clothes, which emphasizes the whole aesthetics of your body. As if hypnotized, Itadori watches your curves, how they change when you change posture or movement. When you are in your underwear, you specifically approach him and start to flirt playfully. When you wear his things, as mentioned by the way earlier. And oh shit, how turns him on when you show yourself a new swimsuit and ask to rate.

N = No (Which won't do)

Anything that will harm you. It doesn't matter whether it's big or small. If Yuji feels that he can be rude to you, then he will definitely warn you to tell when it hurts. After all, on the verge of orgasm, he may not notice that you are uncomfortable or unpleasant.

O = Oral (Likes to receive or to give)

More is to give. His head is blown away because you are moaning his name sweetly and loudly, demanding more. Your morning kiss and praise for being amazing last night will give him confidence. And then, perhaps, your next night will be even better than the previous one.

Although one should not ignore his desires with needs. The guy will be very upset if, for some reason, you do not give him pleasure with oral sex.

P = Pace

In this he is a real professional Yuji knows perfectly well how to stretch pleasure and orgasm as much as he wants. A small effort of will is enough for him, which he has at least a spoonful.

At first he will start with smooth movements, and then gradually accelerate. At the same time, it will be easy to prolong your pleasure, because you will feel the strongest sexual charge directed in your direction. And with each strong orgasm, you will experience not only physical, but also mental pleasure.

Q = Quickie

From slow and smooth thrusts to wet and hot suddenness, it makes you feel your own intoxication, as if you are high. Superhuman abilities do give good results. As it turned out, not only in sports.

R = Risk (Ready to experiment)

In other matters, he is unlikely to refuse, since he himself has long wanted this. But Itadori is a responsible person, so he will think a hundred times and make sure that you accept the offer accurately. Do not be surprised that he will act agitated during such sex. He, like you, understands that this risk is serious and can create real problems.

S = Stamina (Stamina)

You should prepare caffeine and energy drinks, as this machine will squeeze everything out of itself, despite the fact that you yourself were exhausted already in the third round. He will not be enough all the time, and if you ever start to black out from fatigue, the guy will scream that he has not finished yet. It even forces you to limit the number of your intercourse per week, as his stamina is exhausting. And you've told him about it more than once.

T = Toys

In this regard, Yuji is more cunning and impudent. He always refuses to have toys for himself, although he himself does not mind tormenting you with a vibrator or even slipping it into your panties, justifying this by the fact that he does this to keep you close, at the same time showing his concern for you, flickering his ghost in your head. But he's not lucky that you're not such a naive fool. Despite this, the guy gets hit on the head, with a very convincing request never to do this again.

U = Unfair (Does he like to tease)

Very much not even against, but not much into it. Over time, it bothers both you and him, and all actions cease to be unpredictable.

V = Volume (How loud is it)

Pretty loud. But in the volume of your moans, you take over.

They start with stifled growls, to groans because of how fucking amazing and sexy you are. And it all ends like a sugary, but trustworthy silence. Your loud moans of pleasure are a sign that you both were good.

W = Wild card (Random headcanon)

Once there was a case where Yuji could not come. He felt that he could not come even if he wanted to. His arms and legs seemed to be glued together, and he himself froze. I started to panic, think of reasons in my head. You, in turn, noticed this too, and when you asked what was the matter, Itadori turned pale and speechless. After that, he sat down on the bed, and here you started to worry. It turned out that he had masturbated too much over the past month, which has formed a habit of certain stimulation of the penis. At the news, you laughed, and he blushed. But at the same moment he exhaled with satisfaction. The guy was glad that the reason was not in you and not in his health.

X = X-ray (What's under the clothes)

16 cm. During erection ± 2.5

Y = Yearning (How high is the sex drive)

Sex serves him for several purposes: relieving stress, sexual tension, just as a way to prove his love for you... Sometimes the beginning of sexual intercourse depends on his arousal. But for your sake, he's trying his best to hold back. Resorted to masturbation instead of sex, but as you already know, even this has its own problems. Seeing him so depressed, you also do not bypass the mutual concern. Even if you don't really want to do this or you are not in the mood, you will never refuse him. Although you will never let him relax and stop controlling himself. Do not miss the opportunity to talk to him about this, because, of course, he also needs it - to get rid of an inferiority complex and so on...

Overall, ± 8/10

Z = Zzz (How quickly falls asleep)

Quite surprisingly, even in spite of his endless chatter before going to bed, as soon as he put his head on the pillow and lean on you, he falls asleep instantly. You feel him in your arms like a small hyperactive child who constantly wants to tell you something or, out of habit, make a row. And myself in his arms — protected by a large and strong wall.

[tonystarkhasaheart]

You Know Who I am

Tony Stark X Reader

Word Count: 2,741

Summary: Y/N a stripper who has a day job at Stark Industries and her boss pays her a pretty generous visit

Author's Note: Even though this is my first fanfic it will have 4 parts, hope you enjoy it as much as I enjoyed writing it! Part 2 is on it's way soon.

I look up at myself in the mirror, eyes heavy from the weight of my lashes, dark, smokey.. yet sensual. Lips plump and red, a deep red nothing too bright.

I take a moment to glance at the room around me, girls in and out the velvet curtain, changing clothes, spraying perfume and adding last-minute glitter. I look at my phone to check the time 12:46am.

“Hot date tonight?” I hear from my left, I don’t need to turn to see who it is, most of the girls here don’t talk to me, except for Siren. Not her real name of course, but I guess when you have a real-life outside of this you don’t want anyone to know it. I don’t blame her.

I set my phone down and look at her with a gentle smile and turn to the bag I keep under my station between rounds, pulling out my book to read. I can feel Siren’s breathe over my shoulder. “Just some light reading?” She asks.

I laugh lightly “The lightest I’ve read in a while actually.” I smile to myself as I run my fingers over the title on the cover of Quantum Physics and Theories of the Mind.

“Don’t want to spoil it for you” she said scooting back a bit with her hands up feigning surrender.

I smile again, I forgot I actually like her sense of humor “It’s okay,” I look up from the cover, “I already know the ending.”

Before any more words can be exchanged, I hear my stage name being called by the house mom. “Bambi, you’re up sweets!”

“Thank you, Cassandra!” I place my book back in its place and grab my money bag turning to Siren one last time, “Why don’t we ever hang out, outside of here?”

“Because you’re too busy being a smart ass in the real world,” Siren says with a smile.

I wink at her before walking through the velvet curtains where it is almost pitch black, except for the neon lights circulating the room and spotlights on the main stage. I scan the crowd as I listen to my heels click on my way up to the DJ booth. A number of regulars and just as many new faces but the back of one man’s head stood out. I couldn’t quite place it at the quick glance that I got, but he was sitting front and center so it wouldn’t be long before I figured it out.

A dancer by the name of Scarlett was finishing up and I gave the DJ my song. He looked and me and shook his head laughing “You never fail to surprise me” I smile and look back at the stage to see Scarlett doing her best and receiving money from plenty of customers, but she was focused on one, and he looked like he couldn’t care less. Front and center with a profile that could kill, elbow on the arm of his seat with his head in his hand and his sunglasses pointlessly resting on the bridge of his nose. And then it hit me, not only was he like the richest man alive; he was also, indirectly speaking, my boss. Tony Stark.

I had only briefly met him once after my orientation at Stark Industries, so I wasn’t worried about being recognized. It was the fact that he was the man I wanted to wake up to every morning to study his brilliant brain. Now that, that did the trick. I felt heat spread through my body starting at my core and working its way to my neck. I rubbed the back of my neck as I shook off the nerves. I got this, just another customer, just one with a lot more money than most.

As the music faded from Scarlett’s song, I watched her pick up her money and try and shove it in her bag. The DJ started talking to the crowd and hyping up Scarlett as she walked around collecting some final tips. She got on her knees in front of Mr. Stark and leaned in real close. Without a single change in his demeanor, he pulled a single bill from the inside of his suit jacket and handed it to her between his middle and index finger, as if he was trying to shoo her away. But even I could see it was a crisp one-hundred-dollar bill. She looked at the bill offended and snatched it from his fingers before finishing her way around the stage. Once she was done, she passed me with a huff, practically cussing the billionaire out as she exited the stage to the back with her bag overflowing with money from the other customers. Something about being a ‘cheap micropenis douche who wouldn’t be able to appreciate a good dance if it hit him in the face. I shook my head pushing the waves of my hair over my shoulder as the DJ started to introduce me.

“If you thought Scarlett was good let the bar know and you might be able to get a private dance before she leaves tonight. But you might not want to leave just yet because next, we have our very best. A woman who can turn any type of music into your new favorite song. Here to prove it once again, the seductress herself, Bambi!”

I laugh to myself at the length of his introduction, but it’s true I like a challenge and today I picked a song that I normally wouldn’t have. “Back in Black” by AC/DC started playing and I couldn’t help but notice a certain man in the front’s ears begin to perk up at the first couple of notes. Maybe it was my eyes playing tricks on me but I swear I even saw him sit up a little straighter.

I took confident, sexy strides towards the front of the stage and swayed my hips in a circle once I got in front of the pole. I held it as I circled it scanning the crowd. I dropped my hips and rose sensual making my ass bounce to the beat before turning my back to the pole and rolling my hips. Out of the corner of my eye, I could see Mr. Stark lean forward in his chair hands clasped, elbows on his knees. He was invested and I wanted to give him a show.

I started to climb the pole and as I did, he slid his sunglasses off his face, looking directly into my eyes, staring deep into my soul with the kindest eyes I’ve ever seen in my life. But I knew tonight I wouldn’t get to see the pain or trauma he’s overcome through his eyes because tonight, they were filled with lust.

Lust, passion..Possession.

As I slid down the pole his eyes never left my body. I gracefully landed on the floor and crawled to the edge of the stage. I turned to lay on my back letting the waves of my hair cascade off the edge, I arched my back looking straight at him. In a swift motion, almost a blur, my view was clouded by the storm of papers falling from the sky. Now standing directly over me with his hands firmly pressed against the stage on either side of my face. As lay there on my back I realized what just happened. I just made a billionaire rain hundreds upon my body and his face hovering over mine, was him making his claim on me for the night.

I sensually brought myself back to my knees slightly rolling in the thick layer of money that covered the stage. I twirled my ass in a way I know would make anyone weak and I didn’t have to look back to know he was all in. Crawling my way back to the pole using it to stabilize myself as I try to stand, simultaneously trying not to trip on the stage that I couldn’t see anymore. Now this wasn’t my first time getting rained on at the club, however when I looked down, the most notable difference between now and any other time it’s happened was that it was normally a slew of ones, maybe some fives, occasionally a couple stray twenties. But this... was all hundreds. Strictly Benjamin’s scattered across the whole stage to the point you couldn’t see anyone else’s money that was thrown during my set. I’m definitely going to need a bigger money bag.

• • • • • • • • • • • •

Three trash bags, four security guards and five songs later, I just about collected all the money Mr. Stark threw for me. Now usually, we don’t get help picking up our money, unless it’s a VIP room shared by three or more dancers. However, because of the sheer amount of money and the fact that I was the club’s best dancer, they played favorites tonight. Not to mention girls from the back started to pick up bills that had overflowed from the stage onto the floor. Even some of the customers started pocketing some of the cash and honestly, could you blame them?

I immediately gave the bags of money to our house mom so she could cash me out for the night, but as I handed her my bags she told me I had a VIP room and she would put the bags in her safe until I was done. My heart sped up a bit as I hoped it was the very generous billionaire, but what are the odds that he would get a VIP room with me right after throwing a million dollars at me, literally. Technically I could’ve turned it down, I mean I definitely made more than enough money tonight, but part of me wanted to see who it was.

I touched up my makeup, ran a brush through my hair and freshened up a bit before changing my heels to a more comfortable black pair. As I walked through the curtains to the main floor, I could see Siren on stage dancing to “Body Party” by Ciara. I took note that the front row seat was occupied by another man. My heartbeat quickened as I turned towards the VIP rooms down the hall.

The closer I got I could hear the voice I dreamed of waking up next to. I took a deep breath primped my hair and opened the door to the room. His back was turned to me as he talked into his phone. He seemed unamused and inconvenienced. I took the moment to admire his figure as he hung up, not noticing my presence yet. He ran his hand over his face and through his hair, oh how I’d love to lace my fingers through those tresses, before throwing his phone at the coach.

“I heard you were looking for a private dance,” I say as I entering the room further making my presence known.

Unfazed by this discovery, he turned around with that signature smirk. All doubt and suspicions placed aside I was standing in front of the Genius, Billionaire, Playboy, Philanthropist himself, Tony Stark.

“And I heard you were the best,” taking a step closer to me.

“Depends on who you ask,” mimicking his actions.

“I trust my sources,” he said looking me up and down “, they’ve never failed me before.”

“Once or twice is not never,” I scoffed remembering the time my team had to cover a minuscule mistake in one of the details for a new clean air prototype we were working on that could have cost the company millions because one of his “sources” said it looked good enough.

“What are you-” I cut him off, closing the distance between us and reach for his tie to play with between my fingers. The way the fabric felt between my fingers let me know it was no clip-on, job interview tie. It was probably custom-made and imported from France or something ridiculous like that.

“So are we going stand here and banter or did you want that dance. Or was that an excuse to get me alone?”

“You better watch yourself, princess”

“Oh,” I tilted my head to the side challenging his very existence “, or what?”

“You know who I am.”

“Hmm, so maybe I do, but we have rules here,” I push him back on the couch “, Sir.” I smirk before climbing on him and straddling his lap placing my hands on his chest on either side of his arc reactor. I feel him tense slightly as I touched his chest, maybe an insecurity. I scanned his eyes, easily reading everything that fed into my suspicions. He looked as if I would turn and run in fear that he was some sort of monster, at any second just because it was there. I bring one of my hands to his cheek and stroked it in reassurance, silently letting him know I wasn’t going anywhere and not just because he was paying me to be here. He let go of the breath he didn’t know he was holding and regained his cockiness. All traces of the vulnerable moment we shared gone as I slid my hand down his neck to rest on his shoulder.

“So, it looks like I’m getting my dance after all,” he said running his hands up my thighs and resting them on my hips.

I started to roll my hips in circles, biting my lip so I wouldn’t enjoy the touch of his hands on my bare skin too much, “It would appear so.”

“What does a girl like you know about AC/DC?”

“I’m offended Mr. Stark, a girl like me?” I grabbed the hair at the base of his neck pulling lightly, tilting his head back. He groaned as I rolled my hips harder for emphasis.

“That’s not what I—fuck.”

I smiled as he squeezed his eyes shut, admiring the twisted expression his face held. I took the hand that was resting on his chest up his neck to his face running my fingers over his lips, they parted instinctively, before cupping his cheek and leaning in close to his ear whispering, “Mr. Stark I’m afraid you know nothing about me and the type of girl I am.”

His hands slid further up my waist gripping me tightly. At least I’d have a couple bruises to remember him by. He opened his eyes and for the split second I saw them, they were pitch black. He growled slightly pulling me into the most animalistic, passionate kiss I have ever shared with anyone. Quick to reciprocate, I wrapped both my arms around his neck, lacing my fingers in his hair, desperately trying to grasp on to any bit of sanity I had left. He bit my lip asking me for the permission that I granted him oh so quickly and without hesitation. He moved swiftly and his presence was so strong I was intoxicated by his scent, he was everywhere and nowhere at once, flooding my senses with everything that was him. I pulled away reluctantly needing to catch my breath. It came out in gasps, but he didn’t miss a beat sliding down to my neck feverishly, desperate to have my flesh between his lips.

“Mr. Stark,” I moaned.

“Call me Tony,” he said.

“I-I can’t,” I gasped, fighting another moan.

“Why not, princess?” barely letting his lips leave my neck even for a second, not seeming fazed by my answer. I could feel the smile on his lips, I couldn’t give in.

“I just, I can’t tell you.” Whatever spell he had me under was about to have me sleep with my boss without him even knowing he was my boss. Not that it wouldn’t be consensual but I still wouldn’t want to raise any problems at work.

He hummed against my neck and licked from the base of my throat to my ear then peppered kisses back to my lips before saying, “You’re trying to hide something from me, but I’ll figure it out.” He started to stand and I slid off of his lap still in his tight embrace. He leaned down kissing the corner of my mouth and whispered in my ear, “You know who I am,” and with that, he straightened his jacket grabbed his phone and left the room.

There I stood lipstick smudged, high off the intoxicating drug that was Anthony Edward Stark.

[mm2305]

Hi Mil!!

I thought those Meet Cute asks were so much fun!! I am glad you did too!! If you have time I would like to request #35 for Ethan and Olivia.

Thank you!!

-Kate

Please drive!

Pairing : Ethan Ramsey x f!mc (Olivia Valentine) ¦¦ Words/Rating : 1.4k / T ¦¦ Warnings : mention of aggressive dogs ¦¦ Setting : Alternate Universe ¦¦

Prompt : They jump into your car breathless and tell you to keep driving

A/N : Hello!! I'm sorry this took so long but it's here now and I really hope you like this Kate! I certainly had lots of fun with this. Request from the meet cute prompt list (requests still open). Happy reading!

Disclaimer : all characters belong to the rightful owners. Also the Thomas Mendez headcanon here is by @jamespotterthefirst

Masterlist

-/-

It was a warm, sunny afternoon, the sun high upon the sky, the air unusually filled with humidity. A dreadful combination, for sure. The street was mostly empty, the sight of another soul, rare during this time that the heat was at its fullest. Most people would be sensible enough to not go out at 103°F, but as much as he needed to be one of those people, Ethan was on borrowed time that day.

Being an intern at a hospital was probably the hardest - and let's be honest, shittiest- situation you could be in, right? The answer is a big fat no. At least that's what Ethan Ramsey, a doctor who at just his second year as an attending was at the top of his game and highly successful, would say. Why? Because someone has to deal with the interns and that brave soul has to deal with a lot. He speaks from experience.

Hence why this was the only moment he could slip in his schedule to take a break and get some decent coffee. His best friend Tobias, had suggested he go to the new place in the suburbs to get his caffeine fix. Of course, Ethan didn't believe him at first. A coffee shop in the suburbs? Sounds like one of Tobias' usual pranks. Still, his curiosity won and he drove all the way to the suburbs in search of the infamous coffee shop.

He would die before he admitted that Tobias was right, but that was some pretty good coffee. Content and somewhat more ready to go back, he began walking to his car. He could hear some barking in the distance, but that was to be expected. All those rich people around here sure would keep a dog or two. "Well maybe I should adopt the pup Thomas stole. I could use the company of someone not constantly talking" , he thought to himself as he unlocked the car.

Ethan quickly got in and immediately turned on the air conditioning. He sinked into his leather seat and closed his eyes for a minute, finding some relief from the unbearable heat. Suddenly he heard the door of the car open and close along with some very loud barking and he instinctively jumped in his seat, turning to look at the person who jumped in his car.

He didn't even get to utter a word before the woman turned to look at him with pleading eyes.

"Oh my God I'm so sorry for barging in but please please drive ! I'll explain everything I promise!"

Not even thinking about it, he started driving, while keeping an eye on the woman next to him, who was breathing heavily and looking out of the mirrors. It was then that he saw six big dogs running after his car and all that barking he had heard started making sense.

The dogs stopped following them after a few more minutes, their endurance making them seem understandably terrifying. Only then did she relax and take a deep breath.

"Thank you so much for this. I'm so sorry for jumping into your car.", she thanked him with a small smile.

"Uh… it's no problem. Glad I could help."

"I forgot to introduce myself. I'm Olivia Valentine, nice to meet you.", Olivia extended her hand towards him in a handshake.

Turning his eyes on her he briefly shook her hand. "Ethan Ramsey, it's…certainly interesting to meet you"

She laughed slightly at that, shaking her head and looking out of the window.

Ethan couldn't help but really notice how attractive she was. Her hair was gold blonde and tied back into a high ponytail, shaped in loose curls. Her eyes were big and green and her skin was spotless. Olivia wasn't wearing much makeup but what really stood out was her plump, bright red lips, perfectly contrasting with her fair skin. She was dressed in a simple, professional, dark blue , form-fitting dress with black high heels that accentuated her long legs. She was wearing a silver, elegant wrist watch and in her lap rested a black briefcase.

"Would it be okay if I asked what just happened to you, Miss Valentine?", the urge to solve mysteries whether it was regarding medicine or this beautiful woman, propelled him towards asking her this question. Besides she just came out of nowhere, I have a right I ask her. Right?

"Please call me Olivia."

"Only if you call me Ethan"

She grinned and nodded. "Deal"

"So, Ethan , I am a real estate agent. I had an appointment with a client to show him a villa that was for sale but I had been waiting outside the house for thirty minutes and he hadn't shown up. And of course, he didn't even call to let me know that he wouldn't come, instead of letting me roast in the sun. Anyways, I decided to leave and I walked a couple of blocks down the street in hopes of getting a cab. You can guess how well that went in this time and area, so I called a colleague to come pick me up. I was waiting for her to come, when two of these huge ass dogs escaped their homes, thinking I was an intruder just because I passed by and began coming closer, teeth bared and all. Since I am so lucky today, somehow more dogs gathered so I panicked and ran. They started chasing me… and then Olivia met Ethan", she finished her story with a dry chuckle.

Ethan was left speechless. His surprise must have been written all across his face because next thing he knew she was bursting into laughter.

"I'm-I'm sorry… it's just--that you should see your face", she said in between laughing.

"I mean. Wow. And all because of that jerk of a client."

"Definitely a jerk and not only because of that. He's a plastic surgeon and he's all about how successful he is or some shit. "I'm Dr. Thorne and I'm one of the leading plastic surgeons in Massachusetts." As if I give a damn. ", she rolled her eyes hard.

"Dr. Thorne you said? Ugh he's one of the worst of his kind"

"You know him?!"

"Yeah unfortunately. He works in Edenbrook, as do I. I'm a doctor."

"Ohh interesting! Let me guess. Internal medicine?"

"Actually… yes. How did you guess?", he turned to give her a surprised look.

"You previously said of his kind. I know enough about doctors that one working in internal medicine isn't particularly…fond of surgeons. Am I right?", she asked giddily.

Ethan chucked at that. "Yes, you are. Mostly at least"

"Nailed it."

Valentine. Where had he heard that name though…?

"You work in the big firm downtown don't you?" , he stated rather than asked after a moment of silence.

"I was wondering when you would figure it out Dr. Ramsey.", Olivia teased him, smirking.

"I am a diagnostician Ms. Valentine. I notice things. And your firm is difficult to miss"

"Technically not mine. My father owns the business."

"So it's safe to assume, your mother is the doctor?"

"Bravo, Doctor. Yes indeed. She works at Mass Kenmore."

"I see… So. Want me to give you a lift? We're already in the car and your work is on my way.", he raised an eyebrow expectantly.

"Sure! Thanks Ethan", she replied, grinning widely.

They spent the rest of the way comfortably talking to each other, both genuinely enjoying each other's company. For someone who was so talkative and gregarious, Ethan found himself interested in anything Olivia had to say. She was smart and confident, but in the most charming way possible. At last they reached the firm and Ethan pulled over.

Both turned to look at each other and started talking simultaneously

"Olivia--"

"I --"

"Ladies first.", he motioned for her to say what she wanted.

"Right. Thank you once again Ethan, both for the save and the ride. It was really nice to meet you.", her hand reached and squeezed his arm.

"You're very welcome, Olivia. I uh… wanted to ask…only if you want to of course… can I have your number?". He was quite visibly stuttering, but he tried to hide it behind a cough.

Olivia looked him in the eyes, clearly seeing through him and smiled. "Yeah, absolutely. Can I have yours too?"

He smiled back at her. "Yes of course"

They exchanged cards and after saying goodbye, Olivia got out of the car and walked back into the office. Just as she sat down at her desk she received a text message.

Ethan : Meet me this Saturday at 8, in "Gaston's Bistro"?

Olivia : I'll be there :)

Ethan : Perfect :D

She put her phone away and got down to work, smiling all the way, already excited for her date this weekend.

-/-

A/N : Of you made it till here, then thank you for reading! Likes, comments and reblogs are always appreciated :)

Taglist :

Perma (all OH edits and fics) : @romewritingshop @codykosuckmytoe @sophxwithers @actuallybored @potionsprefect @ethansramsey @crystalwillow @gryffindordaughterofathena @kiara-36 @mrsethanfreakingramsey @writer-ish @panda9584 @genevievemd @jamespotterthefirst @queencarb @shanzay44 @nikki-2406 @starryeyedrookie @coffeeheartaddict @schnitzelbutterfingers @mysticaurathings @starrystarrytrouble @lsvdw-blog @izzyourresidentlawyer @silma-words @stygianflood @headoverheelsforramsey @maurine07 @natureblooms24 @a-crepusculo @barbean @choicesaddict5

Fics only : @alina-yol-ramsey

+ @choicesficwriterscreations @openheartfanfics

Please let me know if you want to be moved to another category or totally removed. No hard feelings promise.

[shhhlikeme]

“Light Work”

Hawks x Fem!Reader

-> 2.97k words 💘

The Secret’s Out!

Valentine’s Exchange Gift For Nicole💘💘💘 ( @vixenpen ) 💘💘💘 love u!

Exchange Organized by The Lovely @ayocee !!! ❣️

Prompt: Hawks Valentine’s date that ends in smut

Warnings: 18+, sexual content, fluff + smut

A/N: This is my first time writing for BNHA!!! So cool - It was fun, hope it’s sufficient:)

Song: Unthinkable by Alicia Keys 

The chilled red wine cooled your warm tongue as you emptied the remains of your glass.

Licking your now red-stained lips, to get rid of the fogginess you blinked at the laptop screen in front of you. 

“Baby,” you called as you poured yourself a third glass. “Can you show me the sunset again?” 

Displayed on your cute laptop screen is a FaceTime call—one that you certainly could have answered on your iPhone but you needed the visual to be as big as possible tonight.

When your question reached the other side of the call, the screen that once showed you in real-time: the intensity of the Pacific ocean in spring from a birds-eye view, tilted like a rollercoaster. Then, your eyes were met with the awe-inspiring visual that is the Pacific sunset from the point of view in the centre of the ocean. It’s shot from a perfect perspective: a perspective too low for a plane to capture, yet too high for a boat to capture. It is a perspective only attainable by a certain pro hero of yours…

“Wow...” your lips moved autonomously, even before you had time to register the thought— but as are the effects of your favourite bottle of red. 

Your eyes bore into the gorgeous planes of the orange and pink horizon. You unknowingly let your cheek rest on your closed fist, soaking in the rarity of this wonder. Admiring it.

“You like it, beautiful?” Called a loving voice, taking you out of your trance for a second. 

“Of course.” You answered. 

“I—“

“Please. Don’t give me that cheesy ‘it’s not as beautiful as you’ line that’s it’s in every lame movie,” 

The soft joyous chuckle of your boyfriend’s laugh reverberated through the speakers, travelling right from his lips to your heart: effectively warming it in  its entirety. 

“I was actually going to say to say that I wish I could bring your tipsy ass up here.” He chuckled again. “This mission would sure be a lot more fun if your legs were wrapped around me. You know: pretending to drop you so you’d hold on tighter.... your ass in my hands...” 

“Hm,” you smirked, glad that your new boyfriend didn’t plan on giving you one of the cheesy lines most guys did. “I agree.” 

“Yeah?” Your boyfriend inquired, voice rising with interest. “You really are getting tipsy, aren’t you? Usually you’d kill me for even saying that,” 

“Well...Under these circumstances.. maybe I wanna be nice tonight....” you weren’t aware of the sexual innuendo entering your tone when you said that either.

But your boyfriend, however-- picked up on it right away. 

He bit his lip bottom. “...how nice?” 

“Hmmm… Nice enough to balance out the awfulness that is: my boyfriend having to leave me in the middle of our first Valentine’s Day date?” 

Hawks sighed. “Mmmmm I know. I know, baby, and I’m sorry….” 

You frowned. “Why are you apologizing? It was incredible while it lasted and we were able to get through most of it without interruption, so I have to be thankful for that knowing your job. Plus, It’s not like it’s your fault—“

“But I’m apologizing anyway. I wanted to finish the date and be there with you... I wanted to see your face when you saw how I decorated my apartment for you,” 

Your eyes left the passing sunset so that you could take in the over-the-top but romantic-as-all-hell way in which your man decorated his apartment for you for Valentine’s Day.

From where you laid atop the blankets on his King sized bed, you could see the shiny balloons everywhere; some on the floor moving around because the window is open and the air is blowing them slightly. You could also see the dozens of candle flames fluttering with the wind and making the room smell heavenly--you could also see the real rose petals everywhere, even underneath you on the bed, as well as the silver and red streamers on the ceilings that could not easily be reached by anyone but your Hawks. You smiled to yourself at the thought of your cooler-than-thou boyfriend sprinkling girly rose petals everywhere as your boyfriend continued speaking. 

 “--It’s annoying because this mission is not even anything big, either. Just scouting for Selkie while his crew is out. It’s shitty new Hero work, to be honest, but the kids are in final exams right now I guess. Either way, I’d much rather be finishing the amazing date I had planned with you. I mean at least I got to take you to that yakiniku spot, but—“

“—That food was amazing, though,” 

Keigo returned your interruption—though his voice dropped, speaking slowly. “—Your dress was amazing.” 🤤 he let out a sexily breathy chuckle, not missing a beat. 

Clearly, it had been something on his mind judging by how quickly that response came out. 

This time, when you heard your boyfriend’s sensually connotation chuckle; warmed more than just your heart. 

Acting on impulse, and maybe a little bit on alcohol, too, your hand not holding the wine glass fiddled with the end of the short but very expensive-looking dress you wore. It is a form fitting maxi and, yes, it is red. 

You made sure to pick a red that perfectly matched the colour of your Pro hero’s wings. Ironically enough, it matched the colour of the wine you’ve been drinking tonight too.

Needless to say, you ruffled Hawk’s feathers in the best way when he picked you up earlier tonight. He was practically salivating and if he didn’t have reservations you two would have never made it out the house tonight. You made him behave himself until after dinner even though you wanted to pounce on him all the same. The look of your man in a tux, God damn. The wait always made it better, though.

So you two did wait. And that ‘later’ that you two unspokenly promised each other over heated glances at dinner is…. now. 

However, this “now” had been tortuously ripped away from you both when your man got a Hero call just as he was simultaneously fumbling with his house keys and undoing his belt. You avoided pouting or crying about his departure by indulging in your favourite wine that your boyfriend had bought, the one chilling near the bed just for you two. 

“You liked it?” You asked about your dress, your voice matching the sensual aspect of Tamaki’s. 

Your man groaned through the speakers. “Your legs........your ass......” is all he answered before he fantasized over there,

You watched the screen as Hawk’s right-wing that was visible in the FaceTime: straightened. “God, babe...If I wasn’t on this mission...”

“—If you weren’t on this mission, what?” You inquired coyly, unaware of the fact that the hand of yours that was playing with the dress’s hem had now begun brushing your thigh, tingling your skin lightly. The tingling was only intensified by the breezy air that flowed through the opened windows in Hawk’s apartment. It was complemented only by the sound of the breeze that took up the speaker because the #2 hero was calmly soaring through the air. 

“If....” Keigo continued, “If I wasn’t on this mission staring at this fucking ocean.... then I’d....” 

Your fingers pushed your skirt up—just barely. 

“You’d...?” 

“I’d be staring at another ocean, one I like much more--tongue-fucking you so deeply you’d be pooling around me, babe. Just the way I like you to.” 

Your breath hitched when those travelling fingers on yours pressed against the outside of your g-string: prodding lightly against the fabric that covered the ocean your man was talking about. 

Upon hearing your breath hitch, the FaceTime video camera scrambled upward, your gorgeous boyfriend coming into view as he soared through the sky. Behind those transparent yellow goggles, his eyes were wide. Not because he was surprised, oh no, on the contrary: your boyfriend knew just how much you wanted him to make you scream tonight based on the way you looked at him over dinner...that wasn’t it. 

His eyes widened more out of jealousy: recognizing the sound of your impending orgasm—even if very far—as accurately as he can recognize danger on a Hero mission. “Aw, you gonna play without me, baby?” He sounded smug, not sad. 

“Call it getting a head start...” You answered quickly, knowing that your boyfriend’s mission shouldn’t last longer than a few hours. That just meant you’d be able to take a nap in between that would hopefully give you enough energy to keep up with your insatiable, sex-God of a man when he gets home. 

“Okay, beautiful. Then start.” He answered coolly—sexily. 

Your entire body responded in the feeling of increased sensitivity, irrevocably turned on by your boyfriend’s demands. 

And he knew that. 

You stretched so that you could set your wine glass on the bedside table, giving your man a great view of your ass in that red dress. 

The same red dress that’s been living in his horny thoughts rent-free for the past two hours. 

He groaned. “Do that again and I’m losing my job today,” 

You smiled prettily as you returned to the laptop camera, getting comfortable by suckling on your middle & pointer finger gently. 

“Shit, Y/N...I love when you’re eager baby,”

You nodded, staring at your boyfriend through the screen as he flew through the sky. You did this as you awaited instruction patiently. As always. 

Hawks, who had originally been using his back camera-only in order to avoid getting distracting from enemy-watch, tried to remind himself why he did that as he struggled to keep hold of his phone. 

On his end, the sight of you looking so needy and sucking on your own fingers so that they were wet when you plunged them into the heat that—just the thought makes him drool—proved too much for him. 

And you haven’t even started yet.

His dick hardened just from looking at you. 

“No, Hawks. Can’t.” Hawks mumbled to himself, obviously putting his phone back down and switching the camera so it wasn’t facing him again. You were met with the pretty water once encore, the waves now sparkling due to the warm sunset reflecting off of them. 

“I can’t watch, love.” Hawks stated, disappointment evident in his tone. “But don’t stop. Close your eyes and lay on your back.”

Fingers still in your mouth, you listened. 

“Spread those legs, baby.” 

You listened. 

“Hike up that dress but don’t.take.it.off. That job’s for me. You hear me?” 

You nodded, even though neither of you could see each other. 

Hawks, being the good hero that he is, used all of his mental strength not to peek. He had to complete this mission.

You always listened anyway. 

As always.

“Pull down the straps of your dress--just the straps. So that your tits are out. Are you wearing a bra?” 

You were going to move your finger to answer before your man did it for you, 

“Fuck, no you’re not...” he said in a strained voice. He recalled how your perky nipples pressed against the sinful dress’s red fabric in the car because you were cold. This was before Hawks had given you his jacket that you wore the rest of the night. “God imma lose this job....” Keigo muttered to himself, shaking his head. 

“Mm,” you answered around your own fingers. 

“Make small circles around inner thighs, baby. Right around the prize. Use the hand that isn’t currently filling-in for my cock.”

You moaned, doing just as he says with the visual of your man’s perfect dick replacing your fingers in your mind right now. You felt your pussy throb. 

Hawks inwardly cursed his job when he heard you moan, pleased with himself but subconsciously deliberating just how much shit he’d get in if he left this mission post right now... 

After a few minutes, when Hawks heard your breath pick up, triggering him to get harder, he licked his dry lips and said, 

“Mm, now move your thong to the side. Slide those fingers up and down your lips baby, the same way I do with my tongue. You know how.” 

“Mmff,” you moaned, eyes still closed and still licking around your own fingers. You pretended you were cockwarming the #2 hero’s heavenly length. 

“Good, baby. Now switch hands.” 

You listened immediately—using the soaked fingers in your mouth to glide up and down your soaking pussy lips. They slid even easier than your other hand did and since—in your head—those fingers were stepping in as your man’s dick, it somehow felt even more pleasurable than your other hand. 

You moaned, arching your back slightly. “O-oh,” 

Against his better judgement, Keigo was unable to stop himself from looking down at his phone when you moaned like that, immediately dropping the device when the sight of you running your hand between your pussy lips with that sexy dress bunched at the waist came into vision.

“Fuck,” Hawks cursed, flying down quickly to grab his phone just before it hit the water. 

He checked to make sure that him dropping it hadn’t disturbed you, and then he let out a sigh of relief when he realized he hadn’t. You were still doing as he said with your eyes closed, and obviously having a good time doing it too. 

Unable to fight his desire anymore, Tamaki’s eyes darted around, scanning the horizon and the ocean for anyone within a 100-mile radius. 

When he deemed the coast, quite literally—clear—he held his phone with one hand and stuffed his hand inside his pants, grabbing his overexcited dick. 

“Insert one finger baby. You pick.” Keigo directed--his own finger encircling the tip of his dick. He resisted a groan that begged to be released. 

“Good. Now, insert the other. No, nice and slow baby. Niceeee…. and slow,” 

You did--and he copied your movements, a sense of pride washing over him that he had such a beautiful, absolutely stunning lover. 

***

You listened to your man for the next ten or so minutes... trying your best to hold off your orgasm as your stomach coiled in the best way. The combination of your fingers; the sound of your man’s deep voice giving demands; the thought of his dick inside you instead; and the way that the wind entering his apartment via the open windows contrasted the heat of your wet vagina; wow…. all of it just felt too incredible. 

“I’m close, baby...” you whispered hastily. “Can I touch my—“ 

Just as you were about to ask if you could pinch your nipples in order to throw yourself over the edge, you were erotically surprised by someone--or should you say someTHING --doing it for you. 

Your eyes shot open, and then your back arched, even more, when you realized that the thing that touched you is nothing more than a red feather. 

It encircled your nipple pleasurably, another coming from the window and encircled the other nipple. 

Your toes curled. The feathers were the same colour as your dress. 

“Ahh, Keigo!” You moaned, not even waiting for permission before you sped up the pace of your fingers. Your eyes squeezed shut on their own fruition.

There was a smirk in your boyfriend’s voice. “I assume they’re there, baby?” 

“Ngh.....” you sped up the pace even more, your short fingers just barely hitting your g-spot; the g-spot that your man’s dick can always reach. You whimpered.

The feathers around your nipples whirled around your body whimsically, filling in for what your fingers were just short of in other ways: 

travelling down the line that centres your breast... 

tracing your neckline... 

moving down to encircle your ankles... 

“Oh my God, H-Hawks, yes-s, ah....!”

The soft-touch of the material’s feathers felt so good. No, they weren’t Hawks’ strong hands, and the two small entities just ghosted over your skin... barely locatable, but it is the fact that they were red and they were your MAN’s —your man who is physically cities away right now—that made this indescribably amazing for you. 

He is cities away: yet he is here. This is him. 

“Hawks…” you sighed, getting closer and closer, 

“Y/N....” Hawks sighed back roughly: deeply. 

Not that you could see but his eyes were half-lidded as he watched you get off. Seeing you be assaulted by the feathers he sent drove him absolutely mad. This had to be the sexiest things he’s ever seen from afar. 

“I love you, Y/N.” Your man said softly, biting his lip and forgetting his demands because right now he needed to cum. The sight of you like this was too much to bear. Hawk’s picked up the pace of his own hand on his cock. 

When the feathers returned to your nipples from your belly button, you let out a wanton scream moan, your white-hot orgasm ripping through your body as violently as the Pacific waves that were crashing underneath your boyfriend right now. 

Hawks’ orgasm followed soon after, your name falling from his lips as he just-barely pulled his pants down in time so that he released in the ocean instead of in his suit pants. 

You both calmed your breathing as you came back down to earth. The feathers fell next to you as if they were sleeping peacefully. 

After a few moments passed and you found the strength to open your eyes, rolling over to look at your Hero. He matched your semi-satiated expression so you could guess that he had found sweet release as well just now.

Keigo knew you well enough to know that you needed a nap at this time, just as you usually did post-orgasm. Therefore, he wasn’t surprised whatsoever when you whispered in parting:

“Happy Valentine’s Day, baby. Be home soon so we can do...this... in person.” 

“Of course.” Hawks answered. Then, he couldn’t resist adding a cheeky pun.  

🕊

“I’ll fly there if I have to.”

[asterekmess]

Plot Twists & Plagiarism

So, I was talking with some people in my discord *cough* You should join and come talk about Sterek with us. *cough* and realized that I had some feelings that I wanted to share. I'm just copying this from what I posted there, bc I don't have the brainpower to better adjust it for tumblr: I was talking to my husband about how conflicted I feel about being a writer/about the way stuff is viewed within media as 'plagiarism' or 'stealing.' And Furthermore, how that view interacts with the recent issue we've been seeing within media re: Random Plot twists for the sake of "The shock factor."

I know that it's been a common idea/theme that people within the TW fandom (and I know this occurs in lots of big fandoms, that's part of my point) believe that things from fic or fic writers were seen by TW creators and stolen to be used for the show, without giving the Original writers/fans any credit. And I'm not trying to say that they're explicitly wrong. There's no proof either way, and it IS entirely possible that that's occurring. I think SPN is the one people think of the most, because they had an entire episode about SPN cons and used a ton of stuff from the fandom to do with ships and costume choices and headcanons without really acknowledging that they took those ideas from fans who had already created it, which left a lot of fans feeling cheated and Outright made fun of.

So, again, I'm not saying that people who believe that are Wrong, and I'm not saying that it isn't something that's actually happened before.

But.

With recent superhero movies/shows/MCU stuff, people have gotten Super upset lately because of random plot twists that got thrown in the end. I'm not gonna list them because A) i don't watch that shit so i don't know many and B) they're from the end, so they'd probably be spoilers for people. But its a valid issue.

It's incredibly frustrating as a reader to follow a show's plotline and themes and arcs, only to have everything Obliterated in the last episode or two because the creators wanted to be 'original.'

But I get why they do that?

As a writer, even just a fic writer, when I see people headcanon things or point out really obscure meta that I Already HC'd or thought about and either have a WIP about or was going to create a WIP about it, sometimes I get fucking scared.

Because of accusations like I first described. Because even if I already thought of it, if I didn't say it FIRST, but then try to present it as something from my own head, there's fear that someone will accuse me of stealing an idea from another fan.

We talk about how having a plotline that people can guess the ending to doesn't always mean it's bad, it means it makes sense. But then, if we guess the ending, and accuse people of stealing the idea when they DO use that ending, of COURSE they're going to start throwing in fucking plot twists out of the blue, because they want to avoid getting told that they took the idea from someone else.

And I know that some of the stuff is Really specific, but it's also REALLY logical. This is a show with millions and millions of fans, and millions of fics and blog posts and meta ideas. SOMEONE is going to guess the right thing eventually. That doesn't necessarily mean that it was stolen by the show, it means that fan Happened to guess it.

Jeff Davis told fans a lot earlier on that Stiles' name was polish, and hard to pronounce, which is why so many fics had about a billion polish names for him. One of them just happened to be right. It's a fitting name, since it means "sword of glory" and that's dramatic as fuck, just like some of the other names used.

Stiles' jeep being called roscoe is a fan thing, it was never confirmed within canon, even though I think some of the actors said that they liked the name. The fact that it belonged to his mom makes sense because it's an old car, he's SUPER protective of it, and his mom died when he was young. It's the same reason people guess that the Camaro was Laura's or that Derek's jacket was his dad's.

And while it does seem suspicious that the show had a storyline that'd been written about before...it's been written about because it's a Very Popular storyline. Tons of shows, especially ones dealing with magic like TW do the plotline of someone being completely forgotten and having that One Person who remembers them bc True Love or bc Family. I know Stargate has an episode on it, and I'm pretty sure Buffy did too (and davis said buffy was part of his inspiration for the show). So did Charmed. And since TW is established as a show that pulls from a bunch of real, often celtic/nordic myths, using the ghost riders Also makes sense. Even having Lydia be the one to remember him makes sense because she was framed as a love interest for Stiles since the start of TW, even if we weren't fans of it/it wasn't done well.

Again, I'm really not trying to say that people who believe it was taken from fans are Definitely wrong. I won't pretend that there haven't been instances where it Really Did Happen with other shows/media bc it HAS, and TW fans have every right to be suspicious of it.

But I personally am torn, because while I find it incredibly frustrating when we get stupid plot twists out of the blue, I also have the urge to do that with my own FICS bc I saw someone randomly guess the ending/plot point and I'm terrified that if I continue to write it the way I had planned, I'll get accused of stealing the idea from them. We can't simultaneously ask writers/creators to give us logical/reasonable plotlines, and then accuse them of stealing them when they do and we randomly guess what was going to happen.

[julie-thefatones]

Ghost of You || Luke x Reader || Part 2

Hello Everyone! Welcome to part 2 of my First FanFic...... If you would like to Read Part 1 click here 💜 But thank you so much to everyone who liked and read the first part... I hope you all like the second part just as much! Okaaaaayyyyyy im gonna go work on Part 3! thank you guys bye :) (Updated- Part three now posted here)

A/N: Your best friends with Julie, since the stamp was removed from the boys they are able to be seen by lifers at choice and can touch lifers at choice, but are still ghosts. You and Luke grow closer and closer starting to go from friends to more than that and everyone starts to notice, it just takes a little longer for you two to figure it out.

WordCount: 3,316

As you and Luke made your way back to the High School you guys didn't say a word, both of you not really understanding what just happened back at your spot by the lake, You were so confused, because Luke is just a friend, and he's your best friends band mate.... which made it even more complicated with the feelings you were currently feeling.... whatever happened back there felt more than just friendship, You shake your head to get that thought out of it, *no* you thought to your self *Luke is just a friend* you could only imagine what was going on in Lukes mind right now, what was he thinking, you thought, looking down at yours and Lukes hands entwined with one another's..... he probably doesn't think anything, you looked up at his face and then turned away the second you saw him start to look at you back. *What is he thinking about!* you thought to your self, you cant help but feel frustrated, Luke must have felt your frustration because you felt his hand tighten around yours "Hey, Y/N.... are you okay?" Luke asked you with real concern in his voice, You look back at him, widening your eyes "Me? oh yeah! just thinking about what I missed in algebra today... Mr. Berty is gonna be Pissed" You said with a nervous chuckle, Luke chuckled along with you " Well, just tell him an emergency came up!! like ya girly thing came" Luke said smiling at you, and you laughed "My girly thing? You mean my period?" You said nudging his shoulder with yours, teasing him, he scrunched his whole face "ahaha yeah! I just always feel so weird saying it" he said still scrunching his face, and you both laugh while simultaneously inching a little closer together as you walked.

As you approached the school, you looked at Luke and saw his eyes get bigger with excitement, confused you looked in the direction he was looking at, you looked all around, still confused and then looked back at Luke "Luke? why are you so excited right now?" you asked him with a slight chuckle, you just couldn't help but laugh with how cute his face was, how excited he was, he then looked at you "Y/N, do you see what I see?" he said with so much excitement, motioning towards the direction of the school, and you look over still not seeing anything, and looking back at Luke "No, I really don't" you responded, he then rolled his eyes, and nudged your shoulder "The gym door is open" he said excited, and the motioning over to the field where there were a bunch of student playing soccer "They are all at practice, which means!..." Luke continued, his eyes widening and motioning them back and forth from you to the door, you, still slightly confused to why he was so excited "What? we should sign up for soccer, because im not very good at it.... you might be good at it!! are you good at it?" You replied, now wondering if he was good at soccer, causing a confused look on your face, Luke rolled his eyes again "Yes I am good at it, but thats not the point! the point is!! EMPTY GYM!!!" he said so excited, he hopped forward dragging you along with him running towards the door "Luke! why is an empty gym so exciting?" you asked while running, as you approached door you out of breath and him being totally fine since he's dead, He continued to smile, and dragged you through the doors "Because Y/N! its an empty gym!" He laughed causing a slight echo "You can do all kinds of stuff... like this!" he said looking at you with a flirtatious glance and then did the most effortless body roll you ever seen anyone do ever! you majorly impressed by Luke and his skills, also notice your heart beating a million miles a minute... but you just let it slide.... it didnt mean anything, you just got done running across a field which is longer than you have ran since you had to do the pacer test in middle school. You looked at Luke and smiled and then clapped your hands slowly together "Wow I was almost impressed Patterson!" you said with sarcasm in you voice, just to tease him a little because you were very impressed, did his arms look more muscular than before? you thought to your self looking at his arms through his sleeveless Rush tee, Luke laughed cutting you off mid thought "Almost impressed? C'mon! you were so impressed by the way your mouth was hanging wide open Y/L/N" He said moving closer to you, until before you knew it he had you in his arms swinging you around, both of you laughing "Luke!!!! put me down you dork!" you laughed, he didnt listen instead he swung you over his shoulder "Not until you admit you were impressed!" he said in a teasing tone, and you knew he wouldn't let you down until you admitted it, but you also were not one to give in so easily "Never!!!" You screamed causing Luke to laugh creating the biggest smile on his face "Alright then! I guess we are going to be here for a while Y/N" Luke said confidently causing you to smile because you didnt mind the thought actually, but he doesn't have to know that "I guess we are Patterson" you replied in the most confident voice you could manage trying not to laugh, just hanging upside from his shoulder.

15 minutes or so had passed and you were still hanging from Luke shoulder in the Gym, except now you two were hiding in the corner because the gym class came back in. You looking at your phone, and whispering to Luke "Hey! there's a 5:00 showing of that movie, you still wanna go" you could feel his little bounce of excitement "Yes!" he whispered back "you even need to ask! is it just gonna be me and you or did you wanna invite the whole gang" he whispered, you sat there thinking for a minute, you would love to just have it be you and Luke but you also don't want to cause any rifts with Julie, she is your best friend after all and she has been wanting to see this movie for a while, its all she talked about for a week straight "we better invite everyone, we don't want them to think we don't care about them" you whispered, you could feel the sudden shift in Lukes mood, *was he disappointed?* you wondered to yourself "Yeah your right... ill tell the boys" he whispered, you could feel him playing with your shoe laces on your shoes, just twiddling them around in his fingers "Hey Y/N, we should sit next to each other though, ya know just because then we can make fun of it, in case it turns out bad" he whispered with a nervous type of laughter, causing you to smile, you whispered a chuckle, slapping his butt in a rhythm to your words "Of course you dork! duh" you whispered, you felt him bounce in excitement again, then rubbing your calf "Y/N, has the blood started rushing to your head yet?" he whispered to you with a teasing tone causing you to roll your eyes, the blood rushed to your head a while ago but you weren't gonna let that cause you to loose, so you slapped his butt once more "No! you might as well give up Patterson" you whispered with same kind of teasing tone, Luke now slapping your butt in a playful response "Never!" he whispered.

You and Luke had spent around 30 minutes just hiding in the gym with you slung over his shoulder, until Luke finally put you down in defeat. Now you were walking to Julies house with her now that school was over "Where were you most the day today Y/N?" Julie asked you truly confused, *oh crap* you thought to yourself, how are you going to explain your self... you don't want to admit you were hanging out with Luke all day but you also don't want to lie to your best friend, shifting your eyes from your nervous twiddling hands to your best friends confused face "Well, ya know here and there" you replied hoping that would be it and you both would move onto a different subject, Julie laughed "Okay! what are you hiding from me girl! you know you cant keep a secret from me ... now spill" she said but now with excitement and intrigue as to where you were.... *oh just tell her!* you thought to your self "Alright!!! I was hanging out with Luke" You laughed, now super nervous to your best friends response to you getting so close to her band mate, it also felt really nice to get that off your chest "Really?" Julie laughed "What did you guys do all day?" She asked, still laughing, your eyes widening with relief that she wasn't freaking out "Oh, we hung out in the gym, I was trying to win a bet, which I did!" you laughed, with a confident voice feeling proud of your self for the victory, Julie laughed with you "Oh! at 5:00 we are all gonna go see that movie you have been dying to see! you wanna come?" you asked Julie with excitement, Julie laughed "Duh!!!! im there" she said punching your arm playfully.

You and Julie got to the movies a little earlier then the rest of the gang to get the tickets and get in line for snacks, soon Flynn came in and joined you guys in line "Hey girls!!" She said with her usual Flynn excitement and flare "Hey Flynn!" Julie said with a smile and a fist bump, you smiled too "hey girl!" you said giving her a small hug "Where are the guys?" Flynn asked looking around noticing you and Julie were standing in line alone "Oh they should be here any minute" Julie said casually, her being used to them showing up late to places...

As you guys guys waited You just fiddled with a stuffed animal that was for sale sitting on one of the shelves that they have by the line area, enticing people to shop while they wait.. it was just a small stuffed animal, a panda in fact, holding a little heart that said the words I adore you you kind of smiled at it, due to how cute it was, just spacing off playing with its ears while Julie and Flynn went on about something that Nick did in Biology class due to Julies huge crush on him. You felt a brush of air sweep behind you and then "What you doing!" whispered in your ear from behind scaring the crap out of you causing you to drop the Panda, turning and punching the the thing that scared you right in the arm, wasn't long until you noticed it was Luke, who was now holding his arm "Ouch! thats the kind of welcome I get Y/N!" he said teasingly, still holding his arm "You know this is the second time you have punched me today, im starting to think you don't like me or something.... that hurts" he said now smirking with the same teasing tone, you guys locked eyes, you were trying to find the right words to say but were struggling, getting lost in his green eyes, but then found your way back as he looked down at the ground at your now dropped panda "Is this your little guy" Luke says picking the panda off the ground and messing with the ears the same way you were "Its cute!" he said smiling and now motioning it toward you moving its limbs like it was alive, you smiled and pushed the panda down in a playful way in order to see Lukes face "No, its not my panda! he is cute though" you laughed, Luke smiled at you and then looked down at the panda in his hands "So you do think he is cute? well at least I know your type now! a little odd but alright" he said still teasing you, causing you to roll your eyes "Do you want me to punch you again" you said now teasing him "Hey Y/N! Luke! can you guys stop flirting for 5 seconds so we can order our food and go, the movie is gonna start in like 10 minutes" Alex yelled over to us from the front of the snack bar with Julie and Flynn. You turn to Luke and see his face turn a certain shade of red "Dude, we are not flirting! excuse me for being social" Luke laughed while skipping forward, but grabbing your hand to come along with him, Alex rolled his eyes "Yeah, okay! whatever you say pal" Alex said sarcastically patting Luke on his shoulder, You looked around "Where is Reggie?" You asked confused to where he was, Alex nodded his head in the direction of the arcade where Reggie had his head resting on the glass of a claw machine in defeat, using his pointer finger to caress the glass next to the toy he wanted, you and Luke shared a look and laughed in reaction to him "Hey Reg! buddy! its okay, we can try again after the movie!" Luke yelled to Reggie causing Reggie to sigh and look at the toy "Ill be back for you little buddy" Reggie whispered to the toy, causing us all to burst into laughter, in that moment you noticed, just like earlier today... Luke never let go of your hand after dragging you with him, right now you both were holding hands.... your eyes widened.... *me and Luke are holding hands* you thought to your self *Doesnt mean anything! nope* you said to yourself looking down at your hands intertwined with one another, Luke must have felt your wandering eyes because in that moment he squeezed your hand tighter.

As you sat in the movie next to Luke as planned before in the gym you kept looking down at your hand which was still holding Lukes like it was so natural to him, the way your fingers were interlocked with his and how his thumb just subtly massaged the outer part of your thumb.... it felt nice... you glanced up at Lukes face as he was watching the movie, you never noticed how beautiful his smile was, like this dude had a seriously amazingly beautiful smile, you just sat there looking at him laugh at the movie.... he must had felt your stare because in that moment he looked over at you, still not dropping his smile, in fact it grew bigger than before but with a softer touch, he leaned in next your ear "What? is there something on my face?" he whispered, while taking his free hand wiping his mouth, you just chuckled "oh yeah!! there is, its a mess oh my gosh" you whispered back in a teasing tone, putting your hand on his cheek as if to wipe something, and then you looked him straight in the eyes with a smirk "Oh no, that was just your face, my bad" you whispered with the same teasing tone, as Lukes smile turned into a gasp, that was some how still a smile "Ouch, that hurt Y/L/N it really did" he whispered with a slight chuckle, you laughed in a whisper "Uh huh sure it did" you whispered while softly tapping his face, like a small slap before removing your hand from his face, in that moment he squeezed your had tighter again, but this time as if he was happy he still had your other hand..... *That doesn't mean anything, its all in good fun!* you thought to your self..... you looked over to your left at your best friend who was watching the movie, you don't know why but you felt slightly relieved she didnt really notice the interaction you and Luke just shared, until she leaned over to your ear with a handful of popcorn "What was that?" she whispered with a slight laugh, you looked at her with a shy smile, "What was what?" you whispered back, trying to avoid the topic, because you and Luke were just friends and you knew she was gonna ask If it was something more "Is there something going on between you and Luke?" she whispered, but this time in serious tone due to actual sincere curiosity "What do you mean by something going on? I mean we hang out alot" you whispered back, telling the whole truth, thats all it was after all, Julie looks at you and tilts her head with wide eyes as if she were saying really and then motioned her eyes over to yours and Lukes hands that were still tangled together, in which you looked at too and looked back in a swift movement "Oh, thats nothing, we just do that! I don't know why... we just do" you whispered, in a slightly rushed nervous tone, because you really didnt know how to explain that..... you didnt even know your self, Julie raised her eyebrows "uh huh....whatever you say girl" she whispered back, you just chuckle in response not really knowing what to say, in that same moment you see Reggie and Alex passing a note down the line of seats until it reached you and on the top it read To: Y/N and Luke... Julie scrunched her eyebrows together confused, you shrug your shoulders and lean over to Luke "Hey we got a note from Reggie and Alex?" you whispered in confusion, in which Luke looks down at the note and then over to Reggie and Alex who have their eyes plastered to the screen as if they were actually paying attention to the movie, casually eating there popcorn... Luke then looks back at the note and the up at you "What do you think they want?" Luke whispered with a slight laugh, "I don't know" you whispered with a laugh, you and Luke share a look, both quickly shrugging your shoulders and opening the note both using the only free hands you have, when you get the note open Luke reads aloud still in a whisper "So when are you two gonna get a room? because ya know there are people here, Love Alex and Reggie" Luke face then went from a smile into his grumpy Luke face, which he rarely ever makes, you both just look over at Alex and Reggie again who are now looking at you both and laughing

silently to each other which causes you to chuckle as well, Luke looks at you surprised your laughing, but then softens his face at how funny you think it is, Luke starts chuckling too and then sits back in his seat continuing to watch the movie *what were Julie, Alex, and Reggie talking about though? there's absolutely nothing going on between me and Luke.... ugh at least Flynn hasn't said anything* you thought to yourself, you sit back in your seat too, now drowning in your thoughts of confusion....... *Oh boy* you thought to yourself, you then glanced at Luke who felt your look and turned to you "I know im hot Y/N, but you did pay to see the movie... you should probably Watch it instead of me" Luke Whispered to you in a teasing tone and a smirk "Oh! I also have something for you" he whispered in such a cute soft tone, it made your stomach feel weird, *what the heck was that* you thought to yourself putting your free hand on your stomach and then you knew what it was *Butterflies*

[edasnest]

Hey prinxly! How are ya? I apologize before hand if no longer take headcanon asks, but if you still do I wanted to ask if Escaping Expulsion has changed anything in your Blight Parents redeeming themselves scenario?

Hi!! No, you’re fine, my life has been pulling me every which way for a while now so I haven’t had the energy to answer the asks in my inbox 😅

As for how I feel about the Blights, I mean they turned out to be simultaneously better and worse than I had anticipated. Better in that they weren’t like, Victorian era plantation owners and cruel to an insane degree (not exactly a big ask but yknow), and worse in that Odalia seems to be so business-minded.

Odalia seems to be one of those oracle types that only ever sees what’s next and forgets to live in the moment. She also seems to consider every aspect of her life as part of her business, including her family. Her husband creates, her children help her sell. Her only Abomination track daughter is getting distracted? Her asset isn’t being used to its fullest potential? Those distractions need to be removed. Simple as that. Clearly they have the power/money/influence to pull those kinds of strings and we know now that their threat on Willow when they were 5 wasn’t an empty one.

Alador I personally find fascinating. As the fandom guessed, he doesn’t act so much on the abusive parenting side of things, but he does enable Odalia to continue abusing amity. He seems to have some amount of heart? Which is great! He made a passive attempt at getting Odalia to stop the demonstration when Luz said the investors got the idea. But he also didn’t do anything to stop the presentation when Odalia said “it won’t stop until it’s enemy has been destroyed”. It wasn’t until his own daughter showed up that he gave any amount of reaction, which at least tells me he’s concerned for Amity’s well-being.

When the ‘Bom’Tron was being stopped by his own daughter you could see how impressed he was by her strength. She destroyed the first version quite easily and I’m sure worked his ass off that whole week to make it strong enough to beat his daughter and she still managed to stop it. He admired his daughter’s bravery and teamwork with Luz, her straightforward demands to her own mother, the fact that she, of her own volition, destroyed the necklace that acted as a leash to her for most of her life. Of course he was also worried about how Odalia would react to all of this - he came to Amity’s defense in a roundabout way when he (kinda manipulated?) told Odalia that a Blight keeps their promises and then diverted her attention to Amity’s display of power (before having his attention turn to whatever other creature was flying by that he wanted to study).

Up until this point, Amity’s been nothing but an obedient puppet for her mother to control. But now that she’s made real friends? She’s finally thinking for herself and while Odalia seems to be enraged over that, Alador seems to be impressed and even proud. Odalia seems to be so business-oriented that she forgot to worry about her daughter’s future outside of how it would benefit the company. Alador planted the idea in her mind that amity could become a Coven Head. That’s an incredible honor and powerful position to have and Odalia didn’t even think of that.

As for how it changes my views on their redemption, I think they’re on different levels rather than being in the same boat. I think Alador would have a shorter path to redemption if he just showed more often that he actually genuinely cared about his children rather than just tailing his wife and doing as she says.

Odalia though; boy howdy does she have a lot to atone for. I don’t know if she even notices what her children do so long as they keep their grades up and show up for shows on time. I think if there ever came to be a proper rift in the family, the twins and Alador would have to take sides. I don’t doubt that the twins would be on Amity’s side but (like all oldest siblings) they would try to fix the situation and mitigate the damage before actually taking sides. I think is where Alador could begin his redemption if he sided with his daughter, but he could also dig himself deeper if he sided with his wife.

Now that we actually know the dynamics of their family and what kind of business they own and how it operates, I think a lot can be said about what needs to be done in order to redeem themselves to their kids.